Do not enter
This is a dark place... I don't think anyone could handle it besides me, well... one and only one other person I let in, and she didn't stay...
My mind is twisted, smart and cunning.
It knows how to do things I didn't know I could. It knows how I can get away with things I never though possible it... it makes me think irrational thoughts and jump to conclusions that don't fit...
Now let's talk about my heart for a moment,
My heart is filled with love. My heart balances out my mind, for ever thing my brain thinks it can get away with? My heart says, "no that isn't right " for every time I want to hurt myself or die? My heart says " look at all these people I've connected with " and it shows me the strings Tying me forever to those people who I love, but who also love me.
Let's get back to my brain, it thinks logically as a brain should. But then it bounces connecting the smallest details to make sense of nothing; driving me insane. It also looks for things that aren't there just to TRY and jump to conclusions.
My mind is scared. Scared because it knows what it is, and the only time it's let someone in, I've been hurt.
My heart is a similar beast. It has only opened up to a few people. And each time has been, stabbed, burned, and/or broken... including the last one I let in.
My heart with the connections it's made, doesn't let me hate. It won't let me hurt those who have hurt me, it doesn't let me move on, and it doesn't let me show my pain.... because it shows me being weak, and also shows others inside again. With that? My brain now has more to deal with. The thoughts that swirl around, the follow gets added, stress, anger, heartbreak, rage, denial, pain, distress, emptiness, regret, and lastly the one that stays is hope. And without the last one I wouldn't be here... my mind and heart are on the edge. Both being broken right now. They both want to quit and leave, but my soul is keeping me alive... holding me together like glue.
I miss her, I miss the friends who either left, or we grew apart, I miss when I wasn't hurt...
I miss not dreading waking up, I miss not dreading sleeping either... I remember loving our memories,
Not just for the girl I love, but all my friends too! I miss how we were... how we talked... how I felt with you guys and girls...
my mind and heart won't let me let go... because I've lost so much... and they ( I ) and scared of what will happen if I do...
YOU ARE READING
Mesmerizing worlds
PoetryEach of these will be a full descriptive scene. I want you to close your eyes throughout reading and see if you can fully imagine these.
