Truth Untold

11

A Cup of Coffee

You don't say you missed me no more. You asked me for a cup of coffee after office and didn't accept a no.

I remembered watching Louisa Clark from the movie of Me Before You, an extrovert who is extra cheerful and finds joy in almost every living thing, pretending to be excited when she first heard about her holiday as a couple to Norway because there would be a huge triathlon championship there. I remembered watching her plastered a fake smile on her face because on the opposite side of the track, Louisa Clark didn't feel the same excitement as her personal trainer of a boyfriend did feel about the tournament. I had always asked myself ever since; does it mean we always have to put our significant other first before we ever put ourselves? Or worse, does to love mean to forget if we ever have any interest in life so that we put our lover's first? Is it always about the other person before us?

Does it always mean we have to put a mask, acting like we all love what our better half talk about their interest that we don't invest much on it?

The loneliness of eleven at noon in my cubicle was killing me. The co-workers of the same division had departed to whatever meeting they had to attend to. All cubicles had their lights off and even though it was broad daylight outside, it was dark where the lights turned off. This office had a lot to do with their old school design. Obviously, this wasn't the genius so called green design building.

I never fancied being alone. Being on my own was okay, but being all on my own with the lights half off in the room that usually was packed of people, let's just say the eeriness of being alone was never comforting. The stacks of paper, in which laid all of the shits I had to finish, were neatly put on top of my table, next to the mason jar of my green tea. They were the sole reason why I couldn't just leave to a meeting like everyone else. Eventually, one had to be the bigger person, stayed behind the screen and finished all the deck.

The clock struck eleven times; just another hour to go and lunch promised me a better view instead of the same boring grey wall, a plate of carbonara preferably.

"Do we still up for lunch today?" I asked before he could manage to let out a simple hello through the phone call that day.

He chuckled, "No hello today?" He asked, refusing to just let out an answer. Silent. Another chuckle was heard before he responded, "Sorry, Love, I had this meeting and I won't be back for another two hours. What's with your lunch squad? I thought you settled that thing down."

"Yes, unfortunately they have meeting right in the same exact moment of yours. Same old story, different meetings. I have no one here." I said, pouting involuntarily even though I knew there was no way he'd see that.

"Ah, too bad. Can I get a rain-check for today's lunch?"

I clicked my tongue. "Never mind, they'd only be gone for today. I'll have them back again as a whole, lunch squad." Sulking.

"Come on. You know it doesn't have to be lunch whatsoever. Coffee tonight?" He offered.

"I have so many reports to do. I can't."

"You know I do not accept no for an answer. I'll help you with that. 5.15 straight at your lobby, I'll be waiting. My train is here. See you then, Love." He said fast before he bid good bye and ended the call.

How Efrain Harris managed to always get a yes from me when it came to our usual get together was still a mystery. He just had this aura that made saying no to his offering was as bad as kicking puppy. It's just Efrain Harris thing; his effect on me.

It was almost seven at night, one pan of pizza and a couple of plates of everything else had dispersed before our eyes. Efrain and I decided that it was great to treat ourselves for once. Not really, just his excuse because he eventually felt like eating melted cheese, a pan of pizza with extra mozarella happened to be his choice. "Do you still want to go to Starbucks?"

I nodded, wiping the edge of my mouth. "Yes, I still need to finish this." I tapped on my laptop.

"Let's get going, shall we?" He offered, immediately grabbing my laptop to bring and another hand offered to hold.

Two cups of coffee were in front of us. That, also a laptop of my own and a mood board of my content in progress. Across from me, he was unboxing his new iPhone 8+, shouts of excitement was heard here and there as he was made amazed to no end. He was taking multiple pictures, trying out all the features in it, one of it happened to be the bokeh feature. "What is that, Love?"

I lifted my head up, "What is what?"

He pointed to my mood board and my laptop next to it. "Didn't you say you finished all of your decks today?"

"I did, this one's my content WIP."

He frowned, "Did you really have to do everything from deck to content? I mean, what does everyone else do? You have like three deadlines each week, three different contents, none of it are in line to each other."

I exhaled heavily. It was never Efrain's thing to belittle someone else's work. We all know how high he valued what I do. Unless he was feeling utterly marginated, he wouldn't act like a brat he was. I closed my laptop, putting my face on both hands. "What do you want to talk about, hm?" I asked him, a tired smile curving on my lips.

He pinched my cheeks. "What's with this? This coffee get together, I mean. We both have our own things to do. Just... just why?"

"You wanted to meet me which meant you missed me."

"Wrong, I was asking you for lunch because everyone else were gone." I retaliated. Wrong. Everyone could always be a second choice, the last resort for a friend of lunch but of course Efrain would be the only eligible one whom I asked. He is the only one I have wanted.

He smiled softly. "I really wanted to see you."

"Just that?"

He gasped, "I bared a heartfelt answer for you and your response was just that?" He put his hands where his heart is, faking a hurt expression, "Am I not enough for your time?"

I let out chuckle. "I just wanted to know. We both are doing our own things, why bother asking me out?"

"I don't know about you, but I really love to have you around. Whether be it just watching you being all busy with your decks and contents in progress, it's so much more enjoyable to be by your side."

"I have never found the joy doing our own work side by side. What's so romantic about it anyway? I'd prefer the usual Saturday date rather than work date like this. This feels like you're only here because I had dragged you by the hair." I pouted, scribbling nothing on my notebook.

"I'm sorry if you don't feel like being here at all. You must be tired, but no, you know very well that I wouldn't be here if it wasn't my will. I definitely am here on my own will." He apologized, "Should we head home now then?"

I shook my head. "It's great that you actually brought me here. I wouldn't have the will to get out of my cubicle, being stuck for another half an hour and instead of finishing all my work in progress, I would've been doing nothing. I'm just feeling extremely sorry that I let you get on on your own, not minding your business."

"My business here is to see you. Your presence alone is enough for me. I'm just glad that you're here." He remarked, "Besides, you looked the most beautiful when you're focusing on the things you're passionate about." He continued, showing a candid shot of me.

Maybe, just a tad bit of maybe, he never faked an excitement when it came to my work. Yes, he got bored sometimes and often asked for attention, but my laptop was never more intriguing than his presence; a warm smile and countless pinches on the cheek over the cups of coffee we shared. I'd go for another work date if it meant to be with him.

The question is, how did one man say goodbye and still told me he missed me afterwards?