Beggar
Husband: why did you give money the the beggar who pretended to be blind?
Wife : didn't you here the compliments he said to me, he said I was kind pretty charming and very elegant.
Husband: oh he really is blind...
Fat
Wife: ( sobs ) I look so fat plz tell me a compliment!
Husband : you have perfect eyesight!
3 drunk guys
3 drunk guys went in a taxi. The taxi man knew they were drunk so he turned on the engine then turned it off.The first man thanked him, the second one payed and the third slapped the driver.
Shocked that he noticed he said what was that for?
"you nearly killed us! Control the speed!" He said.
