The Sister Song

Just survive the day

Even the daunting first day of school is a part of your collection of precious memories.

****** 

I kept twirling a pencil with a fluffy red head in between my fingers.

"Do you want to talk, about that night?" Damon asked. I shook my head. I knew he meant it for my welfare only, but how could someone talk about something that brings them so much pain.

They say 'talking helps,' they say 'time heals all.' You know what I say? they are all full of crap. Time does not heal all, it only makes it worse. Talking forces us to re-live those painful memories and I would rather have them buried in the deepest pits of my brain. Never to be remembered again, never to be brought up.

"Ev, look at me," he held my chin and turned my head towards him. 

"You have to open up, how long will you keep it inside of you? I know you are trying to look strong and believe me I know how strong you are. However, if you keep suppressing your emotions, one day the burden will break you. That night traumatized you too." My heart melted at his words. But I could not bring myself to talk, to open up.

I just kept staring at the pencil in my hand. I always had a fascination with red and fluffy stuff, which would explain my blood red, fur covered wallpaper. I had fond memories associated with the pencil. It reminded me of the time when we, the Jones were a family who promised to stay together, protect each other and support each other no matter what. That felt like a long time ago, eleven years ago.

Eleven years ago

Securing the heavy back pack on my shoulder, I slid out of our red minivan. Beth soon followed suit. I clasped her tiny hand in mine and stared right in front of us, at the crowd of screaming and laughing children. All unfamiliar faces.

I was aware of all horror stories about first days in new school. The continuous retelling of the stories had lead to this moment being one of my worst nightmares (meeting Freddy Krueger was on the top). The school with its grey coloured walls looked more like a prison and less like a school. The classrooms with their tinted glass window gave the impression of torture chambers.

"This place gives me the creeps," I whispered into Beth's ears. She looked up at me with her big doe like eyes and gave a slight nod.

"Yes! it feels like the castle of the evil witch," she replied. We turned around to face our parents. 

"Okay my dears, few words before I send you off," she said while brushing of the imaginary dirt from our uniforms. She then fixed our already neat and tidy ponytails. "Be careful, don't get hurt, finish your lunch, study hard and make a lot of new friends. Okay?"

We could just nod. I really did not want to go, all I wanted to do is escape.

"Also kiddos, no running away," uncle Aaron thoughtfully added. How did he know of my plan?

I looked at my family for the last time, before I am sent to my doom. My entire clan-grandparents, uncle Aaron, his wife, and my parents- all came to send my sister and I to this prison. Looking at their smiling faces, I felt angry, I felt betrayed. How could they be happy when we are being sentenced to meet our demise?

"Oh I almost forgot," dad announced before fishing something out of his pocket. It was two identical pencils with red, fluffy head.

"For luck," with that he handed both of us a pencil each.