All On My Own //Solby// (Revised/Rewritten)

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April 3rd, 2018~ 10:45 am

I slowly opened my eyes, staring up at my ceiling afterwards. 

' it's a new day..unfortunately..'

I sighed in woe and arose from the comfort of my bed. I stopped in front of my mirror to take a good look at myself. And god, was it a sight to see..

Under my eyes were dark bags hanging low making it appear as if I haven't slept in 4 months and in this case, that was actually pretty accurate. 

My eyes didn't look even remotely close to the sky blue they used to be, instead, they were a pale gray.

My hair wasn't a light blonde anymore, it was pretty dark, I was almost convinced that I was brunette.

And just my face in general, looked horrific. But i didn't care. so i shrugged it off like it was nothing. 

'Well, if i cant be dead, i sure can look the the part.'

I chuckled softly, but i found nothing humorous about my situation. I sighed once again and walked over to my closet, throwing on one of colby's hoodies that i used to be able to fit pretty well. Now, it looks like a nightgown. 

Along with the hoodie, i put on a pair of black joggers and some vans and began exiting from my room. As if on cue, colby's door opens simultaneously with mine. I look up and feel my heart rate speed up slightly as i did. He looked really good.. sometimes i wonder, 'how the hell is he still single?'

I gave a half hearted smile and i was pleased to see that he did the same. however, it left as soon as it came.

"sam.." 

He started, but i shook my head, stopping him from finishing his sentence, already knowing what he was going to say. 

"im fine colbs, just tired." i weakly smiled and started my way down the hall before i felt a hand grip my arm. 

"are you sure?" he questioned. I could see the worry in his eyes. I almost felt bad..almost.

All i did was give him a quick nod. he grinned, letting go of my arm. 

"okay, well, im heading to bren's to film..would you like to come with?"

I cringed at the mention of his name. I hated brennen with a passion. he took colby away from me, he's the reason why our friendship is crumbling apart now. Im not saying colby can't have other friends, its his life he can choose to hang out with whoever, its just the fact that he is constantly with brennen, not making any time for me. but..i know colby. he doesnt do it intentionally..at least..i hope not.

"oh, um, yeah..sure." 

He smiled even wider once i confirmed that i was tagging along and that made my heart flutter. 

"great! well ill be downstairs when youre ready to go." I responded with a small okay and walked into the bathroom to brush my hair. 

Once i was satisfied, i walked down and saw colby on the couch.

"ready?"

I nodded and he got up, grabbed his keys, and we walked outside and into his car. 

The ride was silent but it wasn't awkward or anything. Until colby broke that silence.

"hey.. i know you were lying earlier. ya know, about being tired and all.."

I froze, eventually looking down into my lap, not responding.

"look, you probably don't feel like talking about it but please sam...come and talk to me when youre ready, please." 

I didn't look up, solely because i could feel tears forming and the last thing i need is for colby to see me cry. 

I heard him sigh and felt the car come to a stop. I looked out of the window to see that we were at brennen's place. 

"come on, lets have some fun today, yeah?"

I discreetly wiped my eyes, and finally looked up, giving him a fake grin.

"yeah, lets go."