I'm Not Crazy [ narry ]

letters 16-20

❝ Date: May 10, 1929

Dearest Niall,

I am so sorry for not writing to you sooner.

I was working kitchen duty and some man was talking about Joanne. It was distracting me a lot. I was about to put the bread I was making into the stone oven when the man said she was close to death.

My hand slipped in shock and I ended up burning my entire left hand. I was in the infirmary for a few days. I couldn't write to you sooner because I couldn't hold down the paper with anything.

Niall, why is there so much death in my life? My parents, my sister, the lie I had to tell about you, and now a little girl I have befriended.

I am praying that Joanne is okay. I know I'm not the religious type, but I actually put my hands together and let out a prayer for God or whoever is out there to make sure Joanne is okay.

I don't know if it will work. I really hope it does. Joanne does not deserve to die. And if she does, it shouldn't be in the infirmary. It should be at her home, at a hospital in her own town, with her family. Not treated by some nurse who is afraid that she'll go crazy and bite her or something.

Dr. Payne has not been very nice to me. I think he's getting more frustrated because I still haven't shown any signs that I'm insane. It's because I'm not. How many times do I have to repeat it?

I. Didn't. Kill. My. Family.

I'm not crazy.

- Harry. ❞

❝ Date: May 11, 1929

Dearest Niall,

Louis is very nice. You'd like him. He's really funny.

I know you like funny people. In fact, I remember you telling me that you only liked to surround yourself with funny people.

Zayn finally started talking again. They gave him a bed.

Zayn told me that sleeping on the floor gave him a headache, and he couldn't sleep. I thought it was a little bit weird, but maybe it was part of his condition.

Louis is talking to Zayn, too, and asked Zayn if he thought that maybe not getting any sleep was for the better. You know, because of the nightmares that he got. Zayn told Louis that he didn't like his nightmares, but he practically needed them to live. If he ever got a peaceful night of sleep, he'd go even crazier.

So I guess he will probably be in here for the rest of his life.

They aren't allowing me back in the kitchen. They don't want me around an oven again, in case I had another slip-up and burned myself.

Dr. Payne tried to use the burn to diagnose me as even crazier. He said that I might have too many thoughts in my head, and they could be homicidal thoughts.

So I told him that he was stupid, and that I got scared because someone was talking about how a friend of mine could die soon.

Dr. Payne doesn't like to be called stupid.

I'm not crazy.

- Harry. ❞

❝ Date: May 13, 1929

I want out. I want out so badly.

Joanne is close to death. They are afraid they can't cure her.