skinny dipping

the truth

you do the very things you complain about
then hide it and fight it
but you can't override it
you hide your true self
what's that all about?
playing a psychotic game of internal scream and shout
you act emotionless
care free
self love and appreciation is what you decree
so no one will see
all the issues going on within me
you can't talk about it cuz you wanna seem perfect
but no one believes you
they can tell your brains got a messed up circuit
you're too scared to tell anyone you think you're depressed
and don't know how else to get those feelings off your chest
you hide it
conceal it
so no one can see it
you say you're always speaking your mind
but really you're filtered and dying inside
all this to protect your fucking pride
so no one will know how badly you've cried
you're humiliating and boring
standing idly by and waiting for the imploding
every little thing sets you off
you bite and chew at everyone's feelings
hoping it'll give you a bit of healing
you see it and refuse to believe it
you've got a problem and you can't fucking deal with it
you make the world out to be the villain
but the world is proudly singing
and your ears can't process it so all you hear is ringing
you're the problem
not the world
you aren't even strong enough for your emotions to hold
you've even let them see a glimpse of blue
and they've still got no clue
oh but only if they knew
"if only they knew"? yeah right bitch, they'd hate you the same
quit playing victim and romanticizing your pain
you're life's so perfect you should be ashamed
talking about how sad you are and assigning blame
you forget about the sun and talk about the rain
you'll be this way till the day you need a fucking cane
abysmal bottomless profound
you say that's what you are but the proof is never found
boundless endless immeasurable un-fucking-fathomable
this is what you tell yourself when your depression gives a call
shut your ass up and accept your issues
playing them like a fiddle
doing this shit since you were little
except then you used to giggle
and now you're just bitter
you claim to be different
but you're on the same path as everyone else
you're reckless and rash
not nearly as wise as you say
and you're soon to find your price to pay
for saying you're someone you're not
missing your shot to be great
and now realizing you're too fucking late
you're done
but go keep pretending
pretending you're fun
pretending you're the embodiment of love
saying you were sent from above
to keep a watch over all
how can u say that when you've got no love at all
how can you say that when you've failed yourself
go fuck yourself