𝐨𝐧𝐞𝐬𝐡𝐨𝐭𝐬~𝐬𝐭𝐫𝐚𝐧𝐠𝐞𝐫 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬

Fillie: All I Want

Song: All I Want by Kodaline

Ship: Fillie

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Millie's point of view

I walk around the corner of the building where Finn and Noah are talking.

"Finn."

He looks around and smiles at me, "Hey Mills."

Noah also grins at me and I fake a smile back, "Hi Schnipper."

"What do you need Millie?" Finn asks with a light care-free look on his face.

"I want to talk. In the trailer."

I turn on my heel and don't wait for a response. This was going to kill him.

I step into our trailer, his footsteps right behind me.

"Millie. What's wrong? I don't underst-"

"We need to break up," I rush out, cutting him off.

His face falls, "What?" He says in almost a whisper.

I close my eyes, wanting to shut out the look on his face, "We can't do this anymore. I can't do this anymore. I don't know if we're supposed to be together."

He looks sad, "Why would you say that?"

"Finn..."

"Why do you want this? Why do you feel this way?"

"I just do, okay?"

Finn shakes his head, his volume rising, "I deserve a real answer. You need to tell me why. Am I not good enough for you anymore?"

I move closer to him, grabbing his hands, "No! You're still the sweet guy that I met 3 years ago," I pause, afraid of what he'll say, "But I just don't feel the way I did then."

He lets go of my hands, "You don't love me anymore."

My eyes burn as the tears start streaming down my face, "I'm so sorry."

His face is now red, like he's holding back all the emotions he wants to pour out, "Why don't you?"

"I...well...."

He looks at me with hurt in his eyes, "Who is he?"

I look at him with shock, "He? There is no one else! I promise! I haven't been cheating on you I swear."

He looks like he doesn't believe me, "I hope he makes you happy," he turns from me and starts to walk out the door, "Goodbye Millie."

I run after him, "Finn! Wait!"

He turns back to me, tears streaming down his face, "I meant it, Mills. I hope you're happy. Cause that's all I ever wanted," he grabs my shoulders and pulls me into a tight hug.

I cry into his shoulder, "I really am sorry."

He lets me go, "Me too."

I can barely look at him, I can practically see his heart breaking. I turn before I start sobbing again.

He grabs my hand gently, "I'll always love you. Keep smiling Mills," he lets me go and I can barely hold in my tears anymore.

I watch him walk away, his shoulders shaking.

I turn and run back to the trailer. I can't believe I did that.

4 months later

I see him walk into the trailer. I look over at it with a pained expression.

Noah is sitting next to me and he notices me looking, "Millie. You guys haven't talked in months. I think it's time to become friends again."

I look at Noah, "I don't think I can. After what I did to him-"

Noah put his hand on my arm, "Mills. He deserves to know."

I nod and stand up. Reluctantly, I walk to the trailer and open the door.

Finn is sitting on the couch, on his phone. He looks up and frowns.

"Finn..."

"What do you want?"

I breathe in deeply, "Finn, we haven't talked for 4 months."

He looks at me, "And?"

"I miss talking to you. I miss us."

He laughs slightly, "You miss us? Why? You don't love me. You love Jacob."

Tears are now streaming down my face, "Finn. I couldn't bring myself to tell you. I couldn't."

He scoffs, "Millie. Why couldn't you? Why couldn't you give me an explanation why you didn't love me anymore."

I sob, gasping for air, "I-I lied. I just..."

"So I wasn't good enough."

"No. You were. It's just that I thought he would make me happier than you could," I say, ashamed.

He turns to me, tears in his eyes, "All I wanted was to know that you loved me at one point."

He weeps, collapsing onto the couch. It's almost too much for me to watch, "Finn. I did love you. And I'm sorry that it ended that way. I'm so sorry."

He looks up, "Does he make you happy?"

I pause, thinking about the answer, "I...he..." my voice drifted off. I couldn't answer.

"Why would you..." he trails off.

"It's complicated...he..."

Finn looks like he's about to break, "Mills...if you ever need to talk or anything, I'm here."

"Okay," my voice cracks as I start crying again. Finn's compassion is unbelievable.

"I'm serious."

I nod as I turn to the door.

I look back at him before leaving, "I lied. Not just about Jacob."

He looks up with tear stained cheeks, a question in his eyes, "Do you...?"

I look down, "I never stopped," and with that, I turn and leave him, a sob erupting in my throat.