carla
butt dialer
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"hey carla! i havent talked to you in like a week! how are you?"
"ok first of all, stop being so cheery and second of all dont you mean whats gonna happen this week according to my horoscope?"
"oh...hahaha"
"so i guess you arent going to ask me that so lets cut to the chase eh?"
"woah. ive now officially met serious and grouchy carla."
"why the hell are you calling me at... 12:22 am? in the morning!! shouldnt you be sleeping?"
"hm. its interesting that you think we live in the same time zone... because you're right!"
"what are you on?"
"suga, im just getting high on life"
"hey. im in the middle of studying. i have a test soon"
"sorry... i just, i wanted to tell you that you are a miracle worker. like my date with grace today went amazing!"
"oh! thats great."
"yea! i know! like we skipped last block, which was pretty adventurous and then we went to go rollerblading and then afterwards we had a romantic dinner which was nice."
"sounds nice. i betcha yall had a good time"
"yup!"
"..."
"as my fairy godmother i think you should know something about me, and ya know its pretty crucial information..."
"let me guess...oh... you're a taurus!"
"what no...ok maybe... but theres som—"
"holy mother of aliens! i guessed that. like i swear i dont stalk you! like i dont even know your name. this is like amazing you've made me speechless!"
"oh well i actually wanted to tell you my name"
"..."
"listen, i might be like as awkward as like a turtle but you are wayyyyy worse. like who does that?"
"jordan. jordan does that."
"jordan."
"hm. you know i think you are probably more awkward than me."
"probably not."
"ok you know what. wanna hear my awesome theory?"
"actually speaking of theories i have to go study. there are a whole lot of theories in the math and science worlds."
"you are definitely a nerd!"
"and you are definitely awkward!"
"oof... touché though"
"and before i disconnect this call, i think a little part of me is curious about your awesome and amazing theory."
"ok ready? prepare yourself to be mind blown!"
"when you say stuff like that it makes you seem like a really awkward nerd."
"what kinda stuff. also i 100% accept that im a nerd. nerds are gonna rule the world."
"so basically, before when you called me a nerd, you meant that i was gonna rule the world. how sweet."
"i... uh"
"hm. look here, ive rendered jordan speechless"
"do you wanna here the theory or not?"
"would ya stop laughing?"
"im so sorry but im imagining you with your hands on your hips and saying that. and like wearing a tee shirt that says nerd rule the world and then on the back there would be a picture of a mind blowing up."
"well im imagining you look...like...a turtle!"
"you did not!"
"oh yes i did, so you can stop gasping like you need an oxygen bag."
"what can i say baby your love is like oxygen, it goes straight to my heart."
"..."
"uh hello?"
"zero to one hundred real quick. though i have to say that was really good"
"thanks.. and im sorry. i can be a bit blunt sometimes. i normally talk to my friends like that."
"so im your friend?"
"i can practically see you either doing a happy dance or woggling your eyebrows like a crazy scientist."
"weird analogy but you got me. i was wiggling my eyebrows."
"anyway you have a test to study for so, i'll let you get back to it."
"oh ok. goodnight jordan."
"night carla."
YOU ARE READING
The Dangers of Butt Dialing
ChickLit"ive probably been butt dialing you..." "butt dialing. you. butt. dialed. me." -------------------- carlas life was running pretty smoothly until she keeps receiving calls from an unknown caller. her life starts to change in the form of late night c...
