So much pushing and prodding, needles and tests and scans, why can't I just be normal, what is normal? , are they normal?
When I woke up it was still dark, I think that was the longest I've slept in a long time, but I was restless, I got up from my bed and looked out of the window, what I would give to just fly around for a while, without having to worried about what people think of me, could I really feel normal in this place? , I wasn’t sure, I came away from the window and decided to walk around this place, I opened the door and looked to see if anyone was around, I guessing everyone was in bed and fast asleep by now, I gently closed my door and went down the stairs to the main floor, I recognised where the kitchen was so I decided to have a look In the other rooms, most of them were teaching rooms like English and Maths, near the end of the corridor was a huge door, bigger than the rest, I gently opened the door so I didn’t disturb anyone, I then quickly slipped in and closed the door behind me, the curtains were closed and I couldn’t see a thing, I reached out for a light switch on the wall and soon found it, as the room illuminated with light, my mouth dropped in awe, I've never seen a library like this, the smell of the books and the wooden frames was intoxicating, I think the dream was now gone, and reality had now settled in.
The setting was perfect, there was a roaring fire protected by a beautiful marble fireplace, I nice comfy chair positioned near the warmth of the flames, and a hard back copy of the Phantom of the Opera, perfect, time then seemed to melt away into early morning, I was half way through, when I started to hear birdsong from outside, I placed a book mark and went to open the curtains, the sun was just rising and I could see people exercising in the back yard, the thought was tempting, but the thought of not being able to use my full skills was depressing, but I needed the fresh air and I needed to keep up my physical, I decided to take the book with me and ask the Professor if I could borrow it for a while, but before I was about to leave the library, Charles came into the library, he held two cups of tea in his hands, I'm guessing he already knew I was in here,
'Good morning Rachel'
'Good morning Charles' he handed me of the mugs and I caught a whiff of earl grey with a hint of orange, it smelt lovely, I took a sip as I went to sit back down by the fireplace, Charles sat down opposite me, the fire reflected off his eyes with such power and passion, I was lost for a moment, must have been something in the tea,
'I hope you don’t mind Rachel, but Erik told me about what you said yesterday, I'm glad that you told someone about what happened, It’s never good to hold onto things that hurt us' it did feel good to tell someone about what happened, but it didn’t help to fix what happened, maybe nothing ever would, but hey, what can you do,
'I know, but there was nowhere for it to go, it held onto to me like a disease, and know I feel like I've started again but it just feels like a blank page, I think I just need to find my purpose now'
'Well hopefully you can find it here, I know you don’t want to stay here for too long of a period, but whilst you’re here, If you need anything, then all you need to do is ask' I can't remember the last time I asked for something, it's always been take now and ask questions later, I've never been offered anything, nothing positive,
'Now then some breakfast, and then if you wouldn’t mind, I would like to examine your wings more? 'My options weren’t really open at the moment, and I wasn’t exactly full of energy to do much,
'Sure thing' I finished my tea and took his empty mug, he looked a little dumbstruck so I left him too it and went to go and get ready.
It was definitely fresh out today, but there was more room out here for me to spread my wings out, both Erik and Hank joined Charles outside with me, I was bit nervous, it was like I was putting on a show or something,
'Whenever your ready Rachel'
'Openly at slowly as you can, it will take a while for them to heal properly, any sudden actions could affect the healing process' Hanks words made me feel ever more nervous,
'Hank not another word please' that made me smile a little, I took a deep breath and felt my bones shifting around, as he said, I started to slowly unfold my wings, they were a little sore as I haven’t stretch them in a few days, I didn’t stretch them out fully, just enough for them to be out completely, Charles and Hank stepped forward whilst Erik watched in the back, whilst Hank went round the back of me, Charles went to one my wings,
'May I? ' he reached out to them and I nodded in reply, his touch felt odd, but strangely warming, the last time someone touched them, they were touching them with multiple needs puncturing them, the scars were deep, but I had to carry on, like you do,
'Amazing, the structure is phenomenal, 8ft in span, with the strength to lift a full grown person'
'Charles, I know it may seem hard, but try to keep it in your pants' Charles gave Erik a funny look, it was amusing to watch,
'Once again, thank you for your input Erik, greatly appreciated, but not necessary' I stopped smiling when I felt a bit of pain on my wing,
'Okay, not there please' I felt a hand on my shoulder,
'Sorry, sorry, Hank? ' Hank and Charles came back round to the front of me, Erik came in closer too,
'Slight tear in the right wing muscle, there's also a small fracture but that will heal over time, other than that, no other damages done' yeah, no physical damage maybe,
'Rachel, when we are done here, please come meet me in the Library? ' I met Charles eyes as I heard his voice in my head,
'Well then chaps let's get back too it, thank you for you' r time Rachel' I pulled my wings back in as we all dispersed, but as Charles and Hank walked back inside, Erik stayed outside and sat on a nearby bench, I decided to join him of for a bit, as I sat down a funny thought crossed my mind that made me smile, he looked at me intrigued,
'Penny for your thoughts'
'I'm sorry, it was just now with you and the professor, you two just reminded me of an old married couple' just saying it made me laugh, he looked at me a bit strange like for a moment and then started to laugh too, after a moment we both stopped and looked out to the scenery, until he gently took my wrist in his hand then we both looked at each other,
'I'm sorry about what happened, and if I hurt you in anyway, I didn’t mean too' both him and Charles have pretty much the same eyes, both kind and caring, but not enough to touch my cold dead heart, I think he could sense that too, I placed a hand on his in comfort,
'That’s okay, I'm not the easiest person to handle by any stretch of the imagination' I wasn’t looking for anything, especially not this sort of thing, I just wanted out and back to the good old days, but I could still feel his pain, I don’t think I could live like this,
'Sorry I'll leave you to it' I rushed away before he could reply, I kept repeating in my head, don’t get attached, don’t bond, don’t get involved, I went back inside the house and back to the library to meet Charles, I knocked on the door to the library just in case someone else was in there,
'Come in' I opened the door and closed it behind me,
'You wanted to see me … Charles? ' Strangely there was no one else in the library but me, but who answered me, I walked more into the room,
'Charles? , hello? ' still nothing, I went to leave the library when the talking in my head turned up the volume, I couldn’t hear anything else,
' Hello Rachel, goodness look how you have grown' that voice wasn’t Charles, there was someone else in my head, and he had the volume up on maximum, I could see Charles entering the library, but I couldn’t hear a thing he was saying,
' It's been so long, how many years now, 12 years, and you’ve only grown more beautiful' Charles was trying to say something to me but I couldn’t hear a sound,
'Listen sunshine, I don’t know who the hella you are, but feel free to close the door when you leave' I shouted out to no one in particular, Charles face was full of concern, but when went to touch his forehead, a loud high pitch sound filled my head, I could feel tears welling in my eyes cause of the pain,
' Oh dear, it seems someone is trying to interrupt our conversation, no matter we shall meet soon my darling one, till then' finally the ringing stopped and I could hear again, my knees gave way and I could finally hear Charles talking to me, but my head was tender and sore,
'Charles, much as I love to hear your voice, turn the volume down' the voice sounded so similar to his, but it wasn’t Charles who spoke to me a moment ago, it was someone else,
'Rachel what happened? ' He helped me over to the chair by the fireplace and we both sat down,
'There was someone else in my head, he sounded just like you, but obviously it wasn’t, but he told me that we'd met before, 12 years ago I think, back when I was with my parents, I can think of who it might be, after all those test I had, anything up to moving here to America is a blur' I tried to think back to who it might be, but it hurt even more to think about it, I sighed heavily as I looked into the fireplace, this place must be unlucky for me, these issues just keep popping up one right after the other,
'I'm guessing the voice told you to come into the library out of the way from everyone else'
'Yeah, it worked for about 5 minutes, I'm guessing he wasn’t aware about you and your mind mingling ' despite what just happened, it still was enough for Charles to smile at my comment,
'I'm glad your humour isn’t damaged'
'Not yet' at that moment Hank came into the Library, he looked a little flustered,
'Ah there you are, the results are ready now' he seemed a little impatience, and then Charles gained the same expression,
'Brilliant news Hank, the results are back from your blood tests Rachel, I think it will be something you would very much like to see' I doubt he needed to read my mind to know that, he practically yanked me out of my chair as we ran out of the room with Hank following swiftly behind,
'What did you put in your tea this morning? ' he ignored what I said as we raced of to find out what was so special about my blood.
