BAE BOY

2-21

Okay, Ellen. Finally.

The TV show, I mean. I hope our other Ellen was watching up there, wherever she is, bless her. Because it was a trip, what happened that day. Wild as she was. But in a different way.

I'm not going to talk about all the preparations and travel and whatnot. Just the actual show, okay? Just what happened just before and while I was on the actual stage.

We didn't all go. Aisha said Ellen's people didn't need to be worrying about "wrassling wit the whole crew," and after a little back and forth about it, I finally decided she was right.

So Kendall, Nia and I took Rick's jet, even though the show would've provided transportation. The jet was my idea. Let me explain that a little bit, because this trip was when my whole "situation" started to kick in a little bit, mentally and I guess you'd say "spiritually." And I want to run that by you.

See, as Nia was showing me hotels and stuff, trying to get an idea of what kind of places I'd like for future reference, I started realizing that the real question was, "Who do you want to be now?" Or even, "How do you want people to see you now?"

I'm all for being yourself, no matter what. But there's more to it than that. The Colton James I presented to the world would totally influence what I was able to accomplish, who with and how that got done on a daily basis. Everything we wanted to do would depend on these first impressions people got of us, in a way.

I don't know how I knew it, I just felt it in my bones. This was our "debut." This was our "coming out," in the "society" sense.

It didn't mean we couldn't put on the Ritz sometimes. It just meant that the day we expected the Ritz, the day we couldn't do anything but the Ritz...we wouldn't be the kind of people we set out to be anymore.

And it was going to be hard to hold that thought. Because over the weeks before we went on TV, I went through some intense introductions to who I had become financially.

And we could afford...okay, let me put it to you this way. On the news one night, some congressman explained that salaries for all the federal employees in the country cost the government about $92 billion a year.

He was upset that the president had decided to freeze their salaries. No more raises for anybody, for "as long as necessary."

"The federal government wasted $178 billion last year--the GAO said it, not me," the congress guy said. "That's almost twice what we need to pay all of our employees! Should they be asked to tighten their belts while the elected officials go on spending like there's no tomorrow?"

Cat smirked and said, "Says one of the elected officials..."

"Who was born wit money I bet," was Aisha's take.

So Rick chuckled and said, "Your boy here could bail 'em out."

And when I gave him a stare, he went, "You think I'm joking? With Moby's money, you could cover that payroll and not even feel it."

Turned out he was right. I was about to learn that between two family fortunes, his own and the one he finally inherited and doesn't touch, JJ's worth over $300 billion. That's what I said:

Three. Hundred. Billion. Fucking. Dollars. And some.

You feelin' that? Twice what Jeff Bezos, the Amazon guy, the richest guy in the effing world, is worth.