Opposite Day

A Heavy and Awkward Silence

I relished in the feeling of my toes in the sand, happy to be back on the ground. Salt water splashed at my ankles and Derek's flannel blew behind him in the warm breeze. We'd agreed to call it a night soon since we had school the next day, and decided to end the date with a walk on the beach. It was dusk now, the sky above us painted with quickly fading shades of orange and pink.

"I can't believe high school's really gonna be over soon," he said, our arms brushing together, hands making brief contact. Despite the fact that I'd been clinging to him moments ago, the sensation still made my knees go weak.

"I know," I said, my mind trailing back to what the fortune teller had said about that troubling me. The fortune teller. I had completely forgotten about visiting the fortune teller! Who knew if the store would even be open? And if Derek was my ride home, that meant I'd have to drag him along with me. 

The curse had only acted up once in the past hour or two— maybe it was fading, and I wouldn't have to go. Did curses work like a twenty four hour head cold?

"You got any plans for college?" he asked, glancing over. Our hands touched again and this time he followed mine before I could move away, lacing our fingers together. I blushed, half from the gesture and half from the question.

"Honestly? I haven't even applied anywhere," I admitted, looking out to the water. A larger wave just barely caught my rolled up pants, dampening the bottoms.

"Me neither," he said, drawing my attention back to him. 

My eyebrows furrowed, a smile growing on my face. "Really?"

He shrugged, looking unbothered by the admission. "I just don't know what I want to do yet, you know? There's so many options—colleges, majors, career paths— I don't know how anyone has it all figured out yet."

I sighed, feeling like a weight had been lifted off my chest. "Me neither. Everyone around me has all these plans... it's like they've got their whole life decided already. I don't even know what I'm gonna wear tomorrow, much less what career I want."

He laughed, nodding in agreement. "That was part of why I freaked out last year. Everyone was filling out applications, stressing about their SAT's and acceptance letters. The future just seemed so threatening, especially when it looked like everyone else had it figured out."

"Derek?" I asked, coming to a stop. He let my hand fall from his as he turned to face me.

"Yeah?"

"I..." I shook my head, not sure how to say what I'd been wondering for months. "I just can't figure out why you wasted all that time on... me."

His eyebrows furrowed, head tilting to the side as his gaze trailed over my face. "What do you mean?"

"I mean, you're a great guy. I'm sure you could've had a million dates in all that time you were asking me for one. Why'd you keep asking when I always turned you down?"

"I wanted a date with you," he said simply. "I like you. I've had a crush on you since you sat down next to me and rolled your eyes at Mr. Brine's syllabus."

I could feel my face heating up as he continued, "I think you're beautiful, and smart, and funny— and whenever you give presentations, you have this nervous habit of biting your lip that just drives me absolutely insane."

"I do not." I smiled, looking away.

"Trust me, you definitely do."

I met his eyes, my heart beating wildly in my chest.

"You know, we're not two hundred feet in the air anymore," he said, voice suddenly quieter.

"So?" I played oblivious to his insinuation, sure that my blushing face and stuttered breaths were giving me away anyway.

"So," he stepped closer, our bodies now just inches apart, "Will you kiss me?"

My heart skipped a beat and I swallowed heavily. I wanted to smile, to nod yes and lean in. But a soft "No" came from my mouth, and I could feel my head shaking.

My stomach sunk as he blinked a few times, looking taken aback, face turning red. Why, why did he have to ask? Why couldn't he have just leaned in? Then again, maybe the curse would have gone so far as to push him away.

"I— oh, right. I'm sorry," he apologized, stepping back. He laughed slightly, one hand coming up to scratch the back of his neck. "I shouldn't have— we don't know each other that well, it's only our first date— I just got carried away."

I felt like throwing a temper tantrum as he stumbled over his words, his cute embarrassment only making me feel worse. I wanted to say yes, I wanted to grab him by his collar and kiss him while the opportunity was still there. But my arms stayed by my side, my legs wouldn't step towards Derek, and I knew that the curse was definitely not fading away.

We started walking again, heading back in the direction of the parking lot now that the sun was almost set. A heavy and awkward silence filled the space between us and I felt like I was dying of frustration. I didn't have control over myself— I'd rather yell out that I wanted him to kiss me than suffer in silence like this. Who cares about humiliation? I'd take confused onlookers and laughing teenagers over this terrible disappointment any day.

"Well," Derek finally ended the quiet once we reached the pavement, "I hope you at least had a good time, even with my terrible misreading of signals."

You didn't misread me! I wanted to scream. Almost anything would've been better than what did come out, a flat and unimpressed, "It was fine."

He opened his mouth, but didn't seem to know what to say. He sighed, nodding in acceptance, all traces of a smile gone from his face. "Do you want me to take you home?"

My head shook, and I felt like wincing as the next words hit my ears. "I think I'll get a ride from my sister."

He cringed, looking down at his feet before meeting my eyes again. "I was that insufferable?"

I said nothing, silence forced upon me once again.

His eyes searched my face and he sighed again. "You're one confusing girl, Allison." I swallowed as he backed away, barely able to look at me. "I'm sorry for wasting your night. And for bothering you so much this year. But thanks for finally giving me a chance."

He turned, heading back to his car. The curse forced me to stand there until he had driven away, out of reach for me to attempt any sort of explanation. I felt sick.

I turned on my heel, teeth clenching, fists balled at my sides. My heart burned with sadness, anger, and the hope that the psychic would still be around— I was ready to have my life back in my own hands.