"Are you sure this will work? I mean, they're intelligent people. Okay fine, most of them are intelligent people. They'll figure us out."
"Ah Athena, why must you doubt me so much?" Ares stopped pacing around his room. "If we fake our own conflict, the producer won't try to make any."
"Are you trying to cheat the system?" Athena scoffed.
"Before it cheats me." Ares huffed. Ares opened his mouth to keep talking when they heard a gasp from outside their room.
Athena and Ares exchanged glances, one looking a lot more concerned than the other.
"Hermes? Is that you?" Ares asked as softly as he could, which was eerily softly.
"No." Hermes replied, "it's uh, it's Apollo." Ares swung the door open with a very firm expression, Hermes gave a nervous chuckle. "Did you like my Apollo impression?"
"It was great!" Athena shouted from inside the room. Before Ares pulled Hermes inside via his collar.
"Can you try not to pull so hard on the threads? I got this shirt for $2 at Target. Ow, that's literally the opposite of what I just told you to do." Ares pushed Hermes into a very comfortable suede chair, that was way out of the shows budget.
"You have to swear that what we're about to tell you does not leave this room."
"I swear."
-
Zeus was on his third tub of Ben and Jerry's cookie dough ice cream and had managed to get through 1 box of Kleenex tissues. Leaving Hades extremely disturbed.
"Is it physically possible for one person to cry so much?" He asked, perched on the other side of the bed. He thought that Zeus's emotions were contagious so he preferred to have some sort of distance.
"Hades I miss her." Zeus blew his nose and stabbed his ice cream with his spoon. "And I'm running out of dough. How is that possible it's cookie DOUGH. Maybe it's symbolic for me running out of chances-" Zeus started to ramble, his head down as he muttered to his ice cream about the importance of loyalty and how it shouldn't learn from him.
"Hera, how long have you been stood there?" Hades asked casually, addressing the girl that was leaning on the door frame with a cup of tea. To this, Zeus started to choke.
"Aw, now he knows what it's like to be on the receiving end." Hera chuckled, joining the boys on the bed. Which prompted more intense choking from Zeus. "How many tubs has he had?"
"Three." Hades sighed.
"Jesus Christ, Zeus. You're lactose intolerant. Could you pity eat with something that's less damaging to your health? Like fruit? Or Oreos? Or fucking Haribos?"
"If it's not supposed to damage his health then why are you still naming junk foods."
"Fuck off Hades."
"Yeah! Fuck off Hades!" Zeus furrowed his brows at his brother while swallowing a spoonful of ice cream.
Hera chuckled and shook her head at the man-boy, "why are you like this?" She took a tissue from the box and wiped away his tears. "Hm? How are you going to be the one to break my heart and still be the one drunk on ice cream?" She took his hand and squeezed it. "It's a little bit ridiculous."
Zeus smiled back at her and let out a small laugh, "yeah that's me, the hypocritical bastard."
"I've been trying to make him laugh for 4 hours and nothing's worked, how the fuck -"
"He's been like this for 4 hours and you didn't tell me?" Hera's jaw dropped.
"Ye-"
"Bitch what the fuck. Okay get up Zeus we're going to do face masks now." Hera stood up and pulled Zeus's arm
"Fash mashks?" He asked through the ice cream that was in his mouth. "Why would I need face masks?"
"You look like Apollo when people aren't hyping up his Instagram posts."
"Oh fuck, lead the way." Zeus sprung out of bed and out the door of his room.
"Zeus, you spilled the ice cream." Hades sighed, staring wistfully at the knocked over tub and stained sheets.
"Hera," he drawled out her name in a singy songy manner, "do you mind if I sta-"
"Don't push your luck, I haven't forgiven you." She warned, walking ahead of him.
"I love her."
"I know... it's a shame you act like an absolute piece of shit."
Zeus threw a pillow at Hades's face. "Pipe down."
-
Aphrodite had her fingers pinching her nose as Hephaestus rambled.
"Why aren't you taking this seriously?" He sighed.
"Hephaestus, you're not exactly a wild character on the show. No one will notice if I'm with you or not. I'm only with Ares for drama!" She argued.
"It really does not feel that way. At all." His tone stayed level and calm.
"What's that supposed to mean? You think I'm cheating on you with him? I thought we had an agreement." Her tone, did not however.
"I thought so too! But you don't see the way you look at him. You've never looked at me like that and I just. I don't know if I can do this anymore." Hephaestus's voice cracked. "People do notice. Don't you remember the confessionals?"
"So what you're saying is that you're breaking up with me?"
"Well when you say it like that, it sounds mean." Hephaestus shook his head, "I don't wanna hurt you."
"Well you did." Aphrodite huffed, crossing her arms
"You're being unreasonable." Hephaestus muttered.
"I'm being unreasonable? I'm being unreasonable. Yeah okay." She scoffed and stormed out the room.
"Aphrodite wait!"
-
Persephone, Hestia, Artemis and Apollo were in the spa. All getting their nails done. It was a picturesque scene of towel turbans and cucumber eye masks.
"Why are we so quiet?" Apollo asked, breaking the silence.
"Because we're the unproblematic ones." Persephone answered coolly.
"Oh okay."
