Love ain't fun when it's gone...the story so far

Boxes and crazy

    This is a story about a house...bla bla..I'm finally there!!!! I'm finally there!!!

   I missed writing, I missed time with myself, I missed...peace, but more importantly, I missed peace of mind. I still do, actually.

    So, even though I thought my final destination was moving in this new house, well...

   July 3rd was the day I stepped into my new life. I should have celebrated the day or something, but didn't. The only particular thing that happened were the tears I've shed when finally entering the house. Yeah, too mushy, even for me;)

But brace yourselves: for now it seems that I've stepped in the house from hell. Not kidding! Seriously, not kidding.

  I won the lottery, by the way.  

  No, no, I'm no millionaire. I actually won enough to bye another lottery ticket. But it's a start right? Or a sign. I haven't really decided on that.

  My mother already decided that it was a sign that my luck was changing. Why would I need that? 

Well...let's see:

a) that thing that makes the water run (don't know what it's called and don't feel like looking the word up right now) broke down, so I didn't have any water for almost a week.

I had to live like the Middle Ages..more or less. My showers turned into this: standing in the tub and pouring water on me with a large cup...

b)  one of the heaters in the house was losing water so, guess what? the plumber had to break the newly parqueted floor and the cement under it to see if there was any pipe messing around. And of course, there was, but luckily it was fixed. Now I can wait for winter to come.

c) I don't have any doors in my house, besides the front door, the entrance that is. 

I changed my mind at the last minute about the doors I was about to buy and now I ran out of money to have others, so for the time being, I don't invite anybody over for ...obvious reasons.

But hey, there's always the garden...

d) the garden ...the garden...

Most rooms in my house have garden view, but by the look of it, it's more of a construction site view, cause where there should be grass, there's gravel and lots of useless shit...sorry :P 

I have things I wanna sell, things I wanna get rid of, things I wanna throw away, anything from microwaves to couches and dish washing machines...and I'm selling them below price..waaaaaay below;)  Anything sounds appealing to you?

e) the pool

OH! MY! GOD! The pool...I bought a kiddy pool for my son (maybe to make him or even myself forget that the real one is not usable...for now), but me and the KID can easily get in as well...Hey! it's a start, so back off :)

f) it's been almost a month since I moved in, but I still have boxes all over

My friends and my mom say it's normal, but still...my kid's room is cleaner than mine and not thanks to Kidzilla. Dooooohhhh! My room actually looks like a very messy Amazon warehouse (no offense whatsoever to Amazon:))

g, h, etc etc ...OH! MY! GOD!

Why hasn't anyone warned me about this??? 

   (listening to LOVE RUNS OUT while writing...I can't get enough of this song or of that Ryan :) Isn't he the hottest guy ever? Anyway...getting away from the point...and acting like a horny teenage girl..for nothing :()

Why hasn't anyone told me how difficult it was going to be? I am talking about the whole process, of course. Buying, refurbishing, cleaning, fixing, braking, paying over and over again for shit to be done. (Oh shit, I hope you're all over 18. If not : kids, this is a bad word and should not be used until you come of age)

  As most of you know, I'm not usually like this, except for moments when I'm really lost, confused, annoyed, excited, nervous...somebody stooooooooop me  

   And I think that I need a vacation. Wait a minute: I am on vacation! But I must have forgotten this because of all the work I've been doing lately...also waking up early to take KIDZILLA to summer school did not help at all :(

    I know, I'm a bad mother: I've been sending my baby to school during summer. But let me tell you about this school of his: it's a continuous pool party there. Since day 1, I've been asked to provide my son with necessary equipment for the swimming pool. Hell, I would gladly switch places with him for about a month and this way he would finally understand what "work" means instead of asking me every week.

   And now, getting to serious stuff....Oh come on, did you really fall for this? :)

Seriously now :)...with everything that's been going on in my life, I've come to realize it myself: just like books, our lives are made of chapters. 

You cannot have too many happy or joyful ones without paying for them. And you can never have too much bad going on either...unless you allow it. 

  I guess that both happiness and sadness exist in our lives for as long as we allow them to. Voluntarily or not, we decide to keep either one in our existence by our choices and decisions. 

   Recently, due to a number of events, I've made the decision of not giving a shit anymore. And by saying that, I actually mean...not giving a shit about anything that's not worth a shit. Too much shit going on here...(Kids, don't forget what I said earlier..about becoming of age..bla bla)

   In this chapter of my life I have learned that the inner peace, my own peace of mind is extremely important. I've learned that what matters most is to be satisfied with the life and way of living. Cause if you're going nuts, well...we all know where that goes

  And the problem is that, lately, I've paid too much attention to things that complicate my existence, things that make it ugly. And that, my friends, that is completely unacceptable. 

I know, it sounds cliche, but having a revelation like this is great. It should happen at least once in everyone's life, trust me. Luckily, I had mine in my 30's. Sorry, late 20's.  (come to think of it, not sure if I should say luckily or sadly).

   Maybe it's everything I've put up with in the last few months, maybe it's the white wine I just had (white wine always makes me act crazy), maybe it's One Republic's LOVE RUNS OUT, but I have reached that point in my life where things become more and more clear: I can see what's important and what's not, what matters and what doesn't, what makes a difference in my life and what doesn't. 

   Another thing that I sadly became too aware of was how, at some point, everything revolves around money. If we're lucky, we lead our lives above this, but keeping one thing in mind:Money can't buy happiness, but it's a hell of a lot more comfortable to cry in a Mercedes than on a bicycle.