Jailbreak

Chapter 10: Raven

"Come to the building where this all began. I'll show you something that will open your eyes once more. I'll wait, Raven. I'll wait forever until you come."

I cast my eyes over the short message, written in what no mistake was Jay's handwriting. Messy, rushed, not even a bit of neatness in it at all.

Almost instantly red hot lava poured into my head. His tone in the letter, as if he was doing good to me by appearing out of nowhere and pushing a piece of paper into my hand, destroying all my attempts to forget my foolish childhood days, made me want to tear my hair out and scream. "I'll show you something that will open your eyes once more"?What the hell did he mean by that? I don't ever remember closing my eyes, thank you very much. Hell, it's him who has to open his eyes to reality. He's the one who's still living in a fairy tale dream.

And the next thing I knew, I was screaming at the top of my lungs, shredding the paper into pieces. I seized hold of my gun, and started gunning down everything around me. TO HELL WITH JAY! TO HELL WITH HIM!! I screamed and screamed, my head a state of chaos, only feeling that boiling lava flowing through my body, and listening to the sound of destruction all around me.

Suddenly, a high pitched scream of pain cut through the red haze of anger like a knife to a piece of cloth. My vision abruptly came to focus, and what met them felt as if my head had been dunked in a tub of icy water.

A little girl, no more than 5 years old, was collapsed on the ground, her whole body convulsing as a pool of bright red blood spread onto the cold concrete ground below her. Her head turned to look at me, and I could see her beautiful green eyes, wide open with fear and pain, filled with tears, becoming glassier by the second. She extended an arm, whimpering, "It hurts, it hurts. Help me..." She was too young to realize that it was I who had caused all of her pain, that this black chunk of metal in my hand had made the hole in her body.

"Ah... ah..." I felt my entire body go slack, and the gun hit the ground with an empty clatter. My hand grabbed at black uniform, grasping at the cloth material as if that would help crush all the mistakes I'd made into nothingness and put everything back to normal. Behind the eyelids of my squeezed shut eyes, dreadful scenes of that day when I lost my mother to those keepers flashed. "No...I...I didn't..."

The little girl retched and vomited blood a horrible sound that echoed in my mind. It was the same sound Mum made before she died. From that gun wound in her chest.

I couldn't take it anymore. I turned on my heels, grabbed my gun, and ran. Tears streamed down my face. Even with the blindfold on, the crushing feeling in my heart was almost enough to make me insane. The sound of the girl vomiting blood repeated over and over in my head, alongside the sounds of my mother in her final seconds, until I couldn't tell the two of them apart from each other. It felt as if the girl's glassy eyes were staring at me, staring hard, like they wanted to open a hole in my body, like I had in her body with my gun.

It's not my fault, not my fault, not my fault...

I echoed the same words again and again as I ran through the streets, the same words I am still repeating now.

I open my eyes, clasping my hands together in an attempt to stop them from shaking. But it's no use - it's as if they have a mind of their own.

I sigh. Just forget about it. The damage is done. It's no use crying over spilled milk, Raven. You can't change the past. Just forget about it, and move on. It can't be that hard.

Standing up from my desk, I shove my hands into the pockets of black full-length coat, and begin walking towards the door. Maybe a patrol in the streets will help me keep my mind busy. The papers could wait until I come back. I move to open the door of my office, when I feel something brush against my hand in my pocket, making a slight csh sound.

I frown. I hate having anything unnecessary in my pockets, and a piece of loose paper is definitely something unnecessary. I seize hold of the paper and bring it out into the open so I can throw it into the bin. But as I realize what the piece of paper is, I stop dead in my tracks.

It's the last thing I want to see today, or ever in my life, for that matter.

Jay's letter.

What, hadn't I thrown it away as soon as I came back to the headquarters? To tell the truth, everything that had happened on that day after that incident is a bit fuzzy in my mind. Maybe I hadn't gotten around to throwing the paper away, as I had too many things in my mind.

Too many things in my mind. How tragic. I smile wryly as I move to throw the piece of paper in the bin. I should have done this as soon as I'd gotten it. It was all because of his letter that I'd killed the girl. Yes, that's right. It wasn't my fault at all.

The letter falls from my fingers and I sigh as I move to pick it up. The sheet has unfolded as it fluttered to the ground, and I can't help but reread the words written in Jay's messy handwriting.

"Come to the building where this all began. I'll show you something that will open your eyes once more. I'll wait, Raven. I'll wait forever until you come."

My mind absently begins to search through the memories in my head, for "the building where this all began". I quickly stop myself and shake my head viciously.

Oh no Raven. You're not losing to your curiosity this time. See where it lead you before? Not on my watch, mister.

But I glance at the paper again, and I know it's useless.

The building where it all began... Is it that abandoned building where we hid in when we saved that old man and were running from the keepers? The one where we made the promise? Of course, that's where it all 'began'.

I clench my fist around the paper, scrunching it into a ball as I gaze out of the window of my office. If I remember correctly, the building would only be a few minute walk from here. Nothing far. I was going on my patrol anyway.

It's all just part of my patrol. I mean, there's nothing wrong with stopping a criminal attempting jailbreak, is there?