Until We Break is now published as a Paperback, Hardcover and E-book from W by Wattpad Books!
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AFTER THE SUN HAD LONG GOTTEN COMFORTABLE IN THE RIVERSIDE SKY, NAOMI BEGAN TO WAKE. She stirred under her sheets first, then achingly opened her eyes to see the blaring brightness shoot from the sun. The corners of her mouth sunk as she watched it. It sat in its lush sea of blue with content and radiance; as if Naomi's life wasn't falling apart and it wasn't a cheering audience.
She gritted her teeth at it and mentally cursed all the words Morgans were never allowed to say aloud, but her jaw quickly slipped, and her heart fell with it. Then, shame shrouded her thoughts until nothing was left and her mind was as hollow as the rest of her. She forced whatever was left of her muscles to haphazardly flip herself onto her stomach where her tsunami raged against the white linen of her pillowcase, unheard.
For a second, in her soft citadel, nothing was with her, not even air, and she thought it was perfect. It was sick of her to pretend that her best friend was alive all this time when she had been dead. For weeks. Maybe this was what Naomi Morgan deserved. She decided that when she joined Jessica, she'd tell her how sorry she was for disgracing her memory. It felt right; like it was the only right thing she could ever do.
But her tears soaked right through her citadel walls, weakening it until oxygen could seep in. She cried even more at the missed opportunity and apologized anyway, praying that somehow Jessica would hear it and forgive her. When her tears ran out and her throat got sickly, she turned, making a conscious effort to avoid eye-contact with her old pointe shoe peeking out at her from her closet. Like this, she watched her ceiling fan spin and waited for her heart to give out on its own.
The door came open. "You're awake." What sounded like amusement glinted Mrs Morgan's voice as she stepped inside, "I thought you'd still be sleeping."
Naomi didn't answer her.
"Today we're visiting Doctor Gonzales. Did you remember?" Now, sitting on the edge of her daughter's bed Mrs Morgan was close enough to make out the dry cracks in her bottom lip. "I told you yesterday."
Naomi knew she could not move or get up. No matter how hard her mother willed her to, she simply could not budge. Perhaps it was why she refused to speak or look her in the eyes. Either way, it didn't matter because the disappointed downturn of her mother's bright red lips stood out in her peripherals.
"Did you hear me? We're going to work to get you back on your feet. It's not over." The amusement that had glinted her tone earlier transpired into suckling desperation. "Naomi," her mother called.
Still nothing.
"Naomi, there's nothing wrong with you." Forced optimism made its way into that sentence, but when it fell on Naomi's ear it sounded more like a vain hope.
The overhead fan continued to spin and tears began to form in the shallow gaze of Naomi's eyes. She denied her mother a direct look but the wetness started slipping out of her anyway in long streams. One down her left cheek for not being powerful enough—
"Naomi, you're scaring me," her mother croaked honestly.
—and one on her right for not wanting to be.
Suddenly, Mrs. Morgan's lips set. She stood up with might, took a fistful of the Naomi's blanket and pulled. "Get up," she demanded.
Naomi made for the discarded blanket but it was already out of reach. Mrs. Morgan dragged and dragged until all of it was flung on the floor. Naomi did not attempt to catch any of it. She was still in yesterday's clothes, motionless and exposed. Mrs Morgan's jaw slacked and she watched her daughter lay there, helpless. She closed her mouth and grit her perfect teeth.
This time, her hands moved a lot swifter and her voice got a lot louder like it was spilling out of a bubbling-over pot. She latched onto anything she could and pulled them all away frantically. Naomi scrambled after her, but the pillows and sheets went flying before she could grab them. Frustration trembled Naomi's bottom lip but she still refused to look at her mother. However, she didn't have a choice when everything had been discarded to the floor and there was nothing left to fight over. Mrs Morgan grabbed Naomi's arm. Their eyes caught one another. Then, they both pulled.
Naomi's entire body felt alien to her as she, for the first time in what felt like years, moved. "Get up! Get up! Get up!" her mother screamed, planting her heels into the floorboards and fighting with all her strength. The both of them pulled with every ounce of anything they could muster until it was a war between fits of shouts and frantic kicking. When their strengths finally matched, however, Mrs Morgan started doing heavier tugs one by one. Naomi struggled and kicked and she thought another tsunami was rushing out of her eyes, but it wasn't. This time, it was a thunderstorm.
The thunder rolled when her throat opened. "No!" she screamed from her croaking throat. Perhaps, the loudest thing ever uttered in the Morgan home.
And the lightning came afterwards when her palm cut right across her mother's face.
Then, the rain began; it poured from her eyes.
Struck silent, Mrs Morgan stared. Her eyes froze over as she exhaled a slither of some incoherent word.
Crumbling, Naomi Morgan cried. And though the mattress was bare of any sheets it still somehow welcomed her deconstruction. She wasn't sure exactly when her mother left her there but there was an unmistakable moment when she felt loneliness re-enter her room. Soon, the bed wasn't justice; Naomi took to the floor.
Author's Note If you're feeling crappy quite sadly clap your hands 👏🏾👏🏾.
This week's dedication goes to none other than @kellz2606 thanks for making me laugh w bomb ass comments. Ilysm. If you vote, comment and share, the next dedication could be you!
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IN THE NEXT CHAPTER...
Riverside didn't do flyers. They did emails and house visits if there was ever a need. Naomi immediately knew who this was from. Her mind thought back to the animal faces she saw in the pouring rain not that long ago. Her jaw tightened. She stepped over it and went inside.
