//YOUNGBLOOD//lrh

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"All the things that we dream about, they don't mean what they did before, I just wanna get back to us 'cause we used to have more."

| 2 years - 9 months - 11 days - prior |

The only thing steadying my steps up the dark staircase is the loose grip my hand is held in. The loud music dies down as we reach a dimly lit room, shutting the door forcefully by the impact of her back. Our lips making muffled sounds as they move against each other. Her hands make their way up my shirt, unbuttoning each button agonizingly slow. My hands are on both sides of her, resting on the door. Generally to contain the person in front of you, making it harder for them to leave; in my case tonight, so I can stand up straight. As my shirt falls to the floor and her hands come in contact with my now bare skin, I hear the moan of her name slip lightly past my lips. "Becca."

"That's not my name, silly." She giggles. My eyes shoot up to hers, causing my stomach to flip when mine don't meet a pair of gorgeous blue ones that I fell ever so in love with. I don't have to be sober to understand that, or remember the feeling she's given me. Her eyes are staring sternly into mine as I stand paralyzed. She moves her hands down to waistband of my jeans, to which my hands grip her wrists and pry them off of me."I- Becca. She's my girlfriend." My words are slurred and paused between my gulps. "And she's also not here." Was the girls response. My dizzy head couldn't stop the actions fast enough. Even the signals to my brain restricted my ability to protest. "A hot rockstar like you shouldn't tie yourself down, anyway."

I find myself gripping at her legs once she straddles me. Being seated over the foot of the bed, I have a good view of the door. Soon, I see it opening to reveal Calum. He stood speechless for a few seconds before the girl seated overtop of me noticed someone else was in the room. Jumping off me, she fixes herself up- not that she had too. I'm the one with articles of clothing off, disheveled hair, and the look of guilt through their bloodshot eyes. "Luke." He whispered. "I- I stopped it." I stuttered as my mouth was incapable of functioning properly. "Yeah that's why she was on you, right?" He walks over to me, seeing my state, and tries to help me stand up straight. "Get up, mate. Bec's going crazy looking for you." I held onto Cal's shoulder giving me a good look into the hallway outside the room. I raise my arm to point a finger, causing Calum to turn around while still keeping a grip on me. Rebecca is staring at us from the hallway, almost emotionless.

"C'mere." I slur to her to which she comes. "You're a fucking idiot." Calum seethes quietly so only I can hear him. I place one hand on Rebecca's shoulder for security and the other cups her face and wipes away the silent tears streaming down her cheeks. "Nothing happened."

She nodded slowly, tears falling to the ground. She bends over to reach for my shirt. "Becky- I swear." "And I believe you." She snaps, pulling the sleeves of my shirt onto my arms and buttoning it up. "You're mad at me." I rest my forehead onto hers. "I'm fine, Luke." She pushes me off, continuing to button my shirt. "He really did think I was you. He called me Bec-" Rebecca focuses her attention on the girl in the room, letting go of me and causing me to stumble a bit.

"I don't know who the fuck you are but I don't need you out of all people to reassure me of my boyfriend's loyalty."

The girl looks very offended and clearly wants to start something. "You shouldn't being tying him down anyw-"

"Leave." Calum raises his voice, leading her to door. "Nothing happened, baby." "Yes, Luke. We're going home, c'mon."

"I don't wanna go home."

She scoffs. "You aren't in the state to be making decisions right now." "You're mad at me." "Shut up, mate." Calum seems to have lost his patience before my girlfriend. "I'll go home when you're not mad at me." I turn my attention back to her.

"Fucking hell, Luke. For the last time- I'm not mad."

"Then why are you crying?" She shrugs in response as her eyes well up with more tears. "I don't know." She manages to croak out.

          "Really? Need me to recap?" Calum scoffs, clearly stating who's side he's on.

"What the fuck do you not understand?" I ask, not knowing who I'm trying to convince at this point; Cal, Bec or myself. "I stopped her, Bec. I could've fucked a hot girl tonight but even fucking hammered I chose you! So what the fuck is your problem?"

I see Cal's facial features weren't softening- much like the tone I began to use with my girlfriend. "What I fucking care about is that-"

"No one saw! No paps weren't with us, Cal. It's not a story that's gonna get out there!"

"She saw!" He stops to make sure I caught a glimpse of my pretty broken and lost girlfriend. " Listen to yourself, Mate. You care more about the fucking headline                  than about your damn girl!"

"She said she's not mad." I state through gritted teeth. "Honest, Cal. I'm fine. I just wanna go home." Rebecca mumbles, walking closer to me. "Really?" He scoffs. "You're fine? You're just gonna go the rest of your life knowing what you saw-"

"Nothing happened." She breathlessly defends me as my head continues to spin. "Right. Keep telling yourself that, because it could have and it was going to- and you know that."

I would have got up to fight him if I had balance of my own, so instead I let Becca defend me, which I'm trying to rationalize. Nothing happened. But this slight part of my head and my heart are dropping a pit of guilt in my stomach.

"This is gonna fuck with you more than you'll let yourself believe, Bec." Calum finally sighs, throwing his hands up like he gives up. "Whatever. It's not my place." He shrugs, however instead of heading to the door he walks over to me, pushing me slightly (which in my state was enough to knock me down completely). "You fucking blew this." He mutters before walking out.

"You're okay, right?" I lovingly ask Rebecca, running my thumb along the tear that ran down her cheek. "I will be." She lightly smiles, resting her hand on my wrist that slowly fell to her shoulder. "Let's get you home, okay?" She wipes away her tears and pulls my arm around her shoulders, walking out at a slow pace.

🌹

As the door opens, I lose all prior recollection of my words. "What are you-"

"Why'd you tell me you were fine?" I pour out, not bothering to wipe the tears or compose myself. "Why did you go so damn fucking long, Becca."

If my heart breaks anymore, I might as well die of a broken heart. I'm hanging by a thread, but I swear on my life I'm starting to feel it break more and more watching her fall apart in front of me; because of me. She shrugged, trying not to make it a story of a victim. Like what's she's been doing.

"Why'd you have to do it?"