Killed by Cancer

Chapter 59

'The trouble is you think you have time' - Buddha.

***

"Time of death 2:37 hours in the afternoon" the doctor announced.

I fell to the floor.

"No no no no," I screamed in between my cries.

My body ached at the sight before me.

"Don't stop," I said as they put the defibrillator down.

"I'm really sorry we tried our best, why don't you come with me," the doctor said, tapping my back.

"Don't touch me! Help Tyler, help him, help him, help him, help him," I repeated, whilst crying uncontrollably.

"Why don't we go into a private room?" He asked.

I got up off the floor hastily and instead of going with the doctor, I ran to Tyler. I held his hands that were still ever so slightly warm. His face was paler than ever. I buried my head into him and cried louder than I had ever done.

"Don't leave me," I cried out repeatedly.

"Alexa?" Dr Ray asked, trying to catch my attention.

"Fuck you, fuck you all," I said hysterically.

"I'll call your Mum," he said.

"I love you so much Tyler, please I don't know what I'm going to do without you, please come back," I said before sobbing again.

The door closed which diverted my vision towards the person standing there; Landon.

"Oh Alexa, please tell me he's just sleeping right? I came yesterday and you were sleeping next to him and he was okay, well not okay but asleep," I heard Landon say.

I turned around to see his face. I shook my head and I hugged him.

"He's gone Landon, he's gone," I cried out uncontrollably.

"No," he croaked out.

I was losing the ability to stand anymore and I felt Landon shake uncontrollably. Before I knew it, we both dropped to the floor together, still crying into each other.

"I can't do it anymore," I cried out.

"I wish it was me and not him," Landon cried in an inhumane voice that made my heart break.

"I'm so sorry," I sobbed repetitively.

After what seemed like hours, we both gradually forced ourselves to stop crying and we both looked at each other. The tears still fell from our faces but we had to stay strong. Landon wiped the tears from under my eyes and I did the same to his.

He held my hand and helped us get off the floor. I hugged him tightly before we walked the few steps to Tyler.

"It's just like he's sleeping," Landon said, his voice cracking.

We sat down on the seats and pulled them right besides the bed. I held Tyler's hand and it was now cold. I traced my fingers around the tattoo on his wrist. It pains me to say that I'll never hear his voice again. I'll never feel his touch. I'll never hear his laughter fill up the room. I'll never hear his jokes that made me laugh even though I didn't understand them half the time.

My eyes watered uncontrollably at the thoughts. Landon held his hand too.

"I love you mate, you'll always be my best pal," Landon whispered in Tyler's ear before neatening his hair.

"He might be cold," I said.

I pulled the blanket and whilst doing so, I gasp escaped my lips as I saw beneath the blanket, his naked chest covered with bruises and scars. I pulled the blanket down and my heart shattered at what I saw. I heard Landon let out a gasp.

The tears fell down my cheeks as I came to the realisation that Tyler had been hurt. Badly. The thought of someone doing such a thing to him made me feel sick.

"I'm so sorry, Tyler," I said.

The door flung open and we turned around to see Dr Ray.

"Normally it is strictly not allowed for you to see the patient after they deceased but I've allowed it because I know how bad this must be for you all but I really must ask you all to wait outside now please," he said.

Landon kissed Tyler's head.

"Until next time mate," he said.

I kissed Tyler's lips knowing it'd be the last time.

"Love you Ty," I said.

Landon held my hand and we walked outside. We walked until we reached the entrance and realised we had nowhere to go. I felt the tears come out again as I kept imagining Tyler running up to us saying it's all joke. I covered my mouth as the sobs escaped my lips. It didn't feel real. None of this was supposed to happen. Life is so unfair.

I felt Landon's arms embracing me.

"I don't know what to say Alexa, it just hurts so much...I can see your mum Lex," he said.

I moved myself from Landon and saw my Mum and John running towards the hospital doors and when Mum saw me, she came straight to me and hugged me without a word.

I cried and sobbed into her.

"He's gone Mum, he's gone and I don't know what to do," I said whilst crying.

"I know darling, I know," she said.

"He's gone," I wailed out. My cries could be heard everywhere.

"Take me home," I said in between my cries as I caught sight of onlookers at the hospital staring at me with pity in their eyes.

John carried me as if I weighed lighter than a feather and he also had an arm around Landon too. John directed Landon to sit in the back and John placed me in the passenger seat. I put my feet on the seat and cradled my legs and hurried my head into my legs.

When we reached home, I went to my room and I stayed there for the rest of the day. I could hear Mum ringing Landon's parents. I just wanted something to take the pain away.

"I wish I was dead," I said.

I went to my bed and lay down. I took off my oxygen mask and waited as the pain in my chest increased till I felt complete numbness and saw complete blackness.

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I'm really ill and I've been ill these past few days which is why I couldn't update. Extremely sorry xx