Madea's Extended Family

Fences

It is now 5:09pm and Madea is looking at a pool party next door. She watches as the teens play behind a wooden fence. Julia in the living room along with Hattie, Bam, and Joe.
Madea: Julia, who them lil girls is over there?
Julia: Those are my neighbors daughters and their friends.
Madea: Yeah, over there with they lil bony asses. Lord these kids today know they can wear some revealing stuff.
Madea goes and sits on the couch where Joe is.
Madea: Julia, what the hell you was doing at the front of that damn store I was back there waiting on you.
Julia: Well if you must know since you writing a BOOK.
Madea: Rude. Lil girl you getting quite bold lately I know you ain't 13 no mo but I will still throw yo ass out the attic window do not play with me.
Joe: Girl, you better watch that tone, you know Mable used to be one of them assasinators. And I'm glad she was cause she gon rot right in hell.
Madea: Joe, shut the hell up I got saved.
Hattie: Shol did when all them sexy fine college boys had pranked us down yonder.
Julia: Anyway, Aunt Madea, I was in the front of the store talking to... a guy.
Bam: A guy?
Julia: Yes ma'am.
Hattie: Oh, yeah, you know them boys round yonder like them pregnant girls. That's how I met yo daddy.
Julia:......then, mamma, how he my daddy if you were already pregnant with me?
Hattie: uh.
Madea: Uh, Hattie(chuckles)
Bam: what the hell(laughs).
Hattie: Girl, shut the hell up being smart.
Madea: Julia, look here. Don't you fall for that man. Baby I tell you I hooked up with a man while I was pregnant with William. Child I tell you that man took all my money. I went back into strippin.
Julia: Aunt Madea.
Madea: Hmm?
Julia: you were stripping while pregnant?
Madea: Girl, Yeah. They called me three buns cause I had one in the oven and two back there. Child I couldn't even drop it like it was hot I picked it up like it was cool. I ain't lian.
They hear a knock on the door.
Bam: Aw hell.
Madea: Bam, what?
Bam: I knew i shouldn't have smoked that blunt in the grocery store bathroom.
Madea: Aw-.
They hear another knock.
Madea: Julia, get the door.
Julia: Why me?
Bam: Bitch, cause you the only one without a warrant.
Julia struggles up and opens the door. She sees that it's Amber and Riley, the daughters of her neighbors.
Julia: Oh, God. Aunt Madea, please come get the door I don't have time for this.
Madea: Girl,
Julia sits down as Madea comes to the door.
Amber: Hi, I'm Amber and this is Riley. Say hi, Ri.
Riley looks at Madea and looks away.
Riley: Ugh.
Madea looks at Riley.
Amber: Anyway, Our friends and us were playing and um... we noticed.... that....
Riley: What my sister is saying is that your old brown thing with wheels over there is way to close to our fence.
Madea looks and sees that her car is 5 inches away from the fence.
Madea: Look here lil White girl, I don't have time ok? That brown old thing over there cost a lot all the damn hooking I did and the strippin I did to get that damn car. And second, that is my nieces driveway so that I'm on baby, so go on, Lil white girls, go on.
Amber: Ma'am I-
Riley: Shut up, Amber I got it. You are too nice I got this. Look you old bag lady. Either you move your little brown shit trap away from our fence or we will move it for you(She and Amber walk away)
Madea: Ok. Ok( walks to her car and cranks it up and bags it all the way down the road)
Bam, Hattie, and Julia looking out of the doorway.
Bam: Oh my God.
Madea drives the car back down the road and runs straight through the fence, destroying it. She almost drives into the pool but the stops in time. She jumps out of the car and she starts throwing pool decorations around. She throws the full slide into the pool with somebody on it.
Madea: I DONT KNOW WHAT IN THE EXACT HELL DON GOT INTO TEENAGERS THESE DAYS BUT YALL DON LOST YALL DAMN MINDS. CUSSIN SPITTING ALL AROUND OLD PEOPLE. IM NOT LIKE YALL DAMB WHITE PARENTS IM THE ONE THATS GON KNOCK YO ASS OFF.
Riley: OLD LADY, YOU ARE INSANE.
Madea: Bitch, get in the pool( punches Riley in the face making her fall into the pool).
Madea gets back into her car and bags up. She stops the car, gets out and goes back into Julia's house.
Madea: THAT HOE LOST HER MIND.
Bam looks at Joe.
Bam: That's yo sister, Joe.
Joe: Bitch, please that's my brother he always been like that.