yoongi checked the time on his phone. it was time to know the results of the pregnancy tests. he feels his hands are starting to swat a little bit his heart beating too fast. he hated the fact that his body sweats so much when he is under the pressure or in stress. he looked around the room and it seems like everyone was looking everywhere, just to not look at the tabel in front of all of them, where the pregnancy tests were located.
hoseok was hugging jimin, who wasn't that calm like he was fifteen minutes ago. the younger was melting his shirt in his small hands. they were the first ones to look towards the table. yoongi was surprised when hoseok stood up and came to the piece of the furniture. he was one of the last person that min thought would stand up first and make the first move.
'i think it's time to know the results' he announced, paying their attention. all bts members' faces were showing not so good emotions. he tried to look confidently at the youngest, but when his gaze met jeongguk's eyes, tears has showed up in his. jeon's sleeves were wet from his quiet sobs.
'i don't want to see this, im sure the result will be positive and our career won't be the same. our fans won't support mentally ill boy, who is in addition pregnant. nobody want a boy like me, im so surprised you haven't kicked me out of the band yet. im just making trouble all the time.' he stood up and ran out of the room. everyone immediately made a move to come after him, but noone were sure if it will help of only worse the stressful situation.
'boys, he's pregnant. all the tests are positive.' quiet whisper broke the silent in the room. their eyes wandered to the oldest, who had the tests in his hands. they were shaking. 'i will go to him. i will call someone if i would need help, but please, don't go after me. he wants space now and im the only one who is going to interrupt him in this. namjoon, call the manager, let him know about the situation, say we will meet after the lunch.' it seems that the role of the leader was temporarily taken by seokjin. he spent too much time crying over the last the youngest's anorexia relapse to cry now or worry about the future.
the present is now important.
'hello, manager-nim. our suspicions were right. he is pregnant.' his hands were shaking like seokjin's were earlier, but it doesn't affect the phone call.
manager replied with silent. white noise was coming from namjoon's expensive phone, which he has been boasting to everyone since last week. now it wasn't important. the phone didn't make the impression on the namjoon like always, when he was using it.
'let's meet after the lunch. manager-nim will talk about this with ceo and management and we will comfort jeongguk. he's not in the best shape now and we'd like to have some time to talk about this with each other' he said, or even decided about the situation, cause he didn't even let manager talk about this.
the silent also answered him this time.
'okay, manager-nim?' he whispered, being confused about not responding from the man.
'okay, namjoom. i just started thinking about this and your plan is good. i want you all to go to the ceo after 2pm.' the respond was surprising, cause he didn't think about the meet with ceo so early.
'isn't is too early to meet with ceo? i said that jeongguk isn't feeling good now and it's better to only talk with you, manager-nim, today in our dorm.' namjoon was ready to make an argument now, cause his boyfriend won't come outside to meet the paparazzi during the ride to the building of bighit entertainment.
'i will message you around 1pm about our meet to talk about this. eat something and comfort the boy, cause i have just made an appointment, which will be this afternoon.'
it wasn't a surprise like today's discover, that jeongguk was hiding in jimin's bed. it was full of soft and puffy pillows, which made it the best place to cry over something. he was holding some plushie squished to his chest. he wasn't making any noise now, but tears were still making two wet and salty roads on his cheeks.
seokjin quietly came to the boy, whose eyes were closed now, to kiss one tear road and then laid down next to the teenager. his hand was looking for other's hand and when finally found it bigger hand squished lightly the smaller one. in replace he got lighter squish. jeongguk was awake.
kim was the bigger spoon, while jeon was the smaller one. it was his favorite position to lay during lazy sunday morning away. even when everyone was lying together - the youngest was always in the center. maybe not every of them was in love with everyone, but all bts' members were in love with this small boy, who was struggling with anorexia in the past and now he is going to carry one of their's child under his heart.
'baby, you know you can always confess to me about everything? if you want you could tell me now, what is going on in your pretty head? tell me about your thoughts, you know i will always support you' he whispered sweet words into smaller one's ear. squished his hand tightly to give him so power to open up about his feelings.
jeongguk always has got problem with talking about his feelings. he can't explain what he feels exactly like he would like to. the words don't matching, he can't find the best term or just he doesn't know what is he feeling at the moment.
seokjin was ready to break the silent after some minutes have passed away, but then jeon spoke up:
'i... i feel so upset, but in other way i... some part of me is saying me, that the baby is... is a blessing or something like this. the most part of me says it's not the right time for a baby and it's totally right. i don't think my anorexia is as good as i want it to be and i will be rounder and rounder and fatter and fatter and... an-'
'shhh, baby. don't worry about this, not everyone gain a lot of weight during pregnancy, not everyone are fat during pregnancy. the baby's health is always the most important, not you weight. you can always lost weight, but baby's health during pregnancy depends on your condition and needs food. not a lot of food, only amount of food, which is making you not hungry.' older hugged younger tighter.
'and the other, the smaller, part of me is saying me, that baby is... that having a baby is still amazing, even if im not fully recovered and still so young.' he ended and started crying. 'i don't want to kill my baby. it's not even an option.' he cried more, sobs getting louder and stronger.
'i don't know what to do, hyungie!'
hi to everyone who is still with me! i was feeling so awful and upset today, but i found some power to write this for you! mistakes will be here and im really sorry about this. i hope you're okay and school isn't that bad!
