No One Cares That You're Broken

Monster

Sam was in the other room pacing up and down, trailing his fingers through his hair trying to make sense of what he just learned.

Cas was untying the ropes on Dean's hands.

"Hey stranger," said Dean trying to look into Castiel's eyes, but Cas would not look at him. He was determined to keep his eyes down. 

"I said hey!"

"I heard you," said Cas. 

"Then why aren't you responding? Why are you looking down?" questioned Dean smugly.

"You know why."

"Just look up, come on; you know you want to," Dean teased.

Slowly but surely, Castiel started to look up. He told himself he wouldn't. He had tried so hard to distance himself, to look at this as a case that he had no relations in, but it was just one look. He missed those green apple eyes and longed to see them again, but when he looked up he only saw black.

Cas stumbled back a little and Dean laughed.

"You know I'm a demon. It shouldn't be a shock to you angel."

 Dean looked into his eyes and saw resentment and... hatred. He had never seen that in Castiel's eyes before, not towards him. 

"Now I've lost him...for good." Dean thought. 

"I know you have control over the color of your eyes assbutt... Maybe Sam was right."

"What's that?"

Castiel looked down again so Dean wouldn't be able to see the pain in his eyes when he said these next words.

"Maybe you really are a monster," said Cas, his voice calm and cool, but his eyes were swimming with tears that he fought to push back. He wouldn't let one fall.

Sam walked into the room and Dean allowed his green eyes to appear. 

"I see you're untied then," stated Sam, simply and plainly.

"Yep; angel boy over there untied them, but there's still no way for me to get out seeing that there's a devil's trap over my head... Care to fix that for me?"

"I have some questions first." said Sam.

"Shoot."

Sam pulled up a chair.

"Have you killed anyone De- have you killed anyone?" Sam repeated.

"First off, you can say my name, Sam... It's Dean if you forgot."

"No, I cant. I don't know the first thing about you. You're a stranger to me right now and I'm going to treat you like one until I get the answers I need."

There was a pause for a moment or two. Dean was at a loss for words. There were parts of him that wanted to be an asshole and push Sam to his breaking point, but there were others that wanted to assure him, to nurture him, to be a big brother again. He answered to the asshole when he was talking to Cas, but now he answered to the big brother.

"I'm sorry that this happened... No, I haven't killed anyone."

Sam stared for the first time at Dean in recognition. He was starting to see his brother again.

"Is why you're a demon now because of the mark?"

"Yes. Crowley woke me up from where you put me in my room. When I woke up, I was a demon and Crowley trained me."

"Does Crowley know you're here?"

"I snuck out if that's what you mean. So no, he doesn't know... not for now."

There were some more questions that followed and Sam was almost satisfied. Dean was acting like himself, but not himself. It looked like he was at war with himself. There was one more question that needed to be asked.

"Dean-"

As Sam said this, Dean looked up, his eyes brightening and it caught Sam by surprise. Was Dean really Dean?

Sam continued.

"Can I trust you?"

Dean looked down again, saddened and angered, innocent and cruel, worried and annoyed all at the same time.

"I don't know."