No One Cares That You're Broken

Faith

Dean woke up with a startled breath as Castiel took his fingers away from his head. Once Cas saw that Dean was awake, he left.

"What- what happened?!" screamed Dean.

Sam was struggling; he wanted his brother back; he didn't want to look at the monster with black eyes that was in front of him now... He wanted to see green so badly, but he had to pretend.

"Dean, we got into a car accident and you passed out, but you're fine. Cas fixed you up," stated Sam.

"Oh," said Dean. "Sam, I'm starved, could you get me something?"

"Yeah, sure, I'll be back," Sam said walking out the front door.

Once Sam was gone, Dean was able to hold his head in his hands and quietly deal with the pain in his head. What was going on with him? Why'd it hurt so much? Maybe Cas didn't fix him up as well as he thought.

He put his hands together and said, "Casti- ugh! CA- OW!"

The pain wasn't from his head this time; it was from... praying.

"Oh no! Please don't do this to me," Dean pleaded. "Please don't take this away too."

He tried praying again, but he was in so much agony, so much pain, he gave up and plopped himself down on the bed in frustration.

"Dean?" asked a voice from the foot of the bed. "Are you okay?"

Dean looked up to see Castiel and his eyes changed from black to green in an instant.

"You heard me?" he asked childlike.

"What do you mean? I came back to see how you were doing. Where's Sam?"

Dean's excitement turned to pain, but he quickly hid it.

"He went out to get some food."

"Dean," said Cas cautiously realizing that his eyes had changed again. "Are you in any pain right now?"

"No, I was in pain a minute ago, but everything's pretty clear right now," said Dean hesitantly. He was forgetting something, but what was it?

Castiel looked at him for a moment in curiosity and said very calmly, "Christo."

Dean didn't budge; nothing had happened. Dean looked at himself in amazement.

"What's going on Cas?"

"Exorcizamus te, omnis immundus spiritus-"

Still. Nothing.

"I'm freaking out here, Cas. Why am I not seizing? Why am I not doing what a demon does?"

Cas looked at him.

"Listen, I may not have that much time with you right now. I need to explain everything to you," said Cas quickly. He then proceeded to tell Dean everything that was said from the demon that Sam tortured.

Dean was shaking.

"Dean, I know this is confusing and scary, but we have a plan to get you back!"

"It's dangerous, isn't it?"

There was silence.

"Cas tell me the truth!"

"Yes. It may cost us our lives."

"Then the answer is no," stated Dean plainly.

"Damnit Dean!" cried Cas. "We're doing this whether you like it or not!"

"No! I'm not putting you or Sam in danger and I'm not worth that!"

Cas stopped.

"You still believe that don't you?"

"Believe what?" asked Dean in a quiet voice.

"That you're not worth it."

Dean laughed sadly.

"I can't even pray to you Cas! That's how broken I am! I try so hard until I'm sobbing on the floor from the pain, until I remember that I don't deserve you."

"Dean Winchester, have I taught you nothing? You deserve to be saved!"

Dean turned away to try to avoid the angel's stare, but Cas took Dean's face in his hands and pulled him closer.

"You deserve to be loved."

"I'm broken!" Exclaimed Dean helplessly.

"Then I'll fix you."

and they kissed until Dean saw black.