Peter Pan Imagines

An Unexpected Return Part 3

Your inner thoughts...

He was gone... Again. Why do I let my anger control me so much? I just can't help myself, I have to say whatever is on my mind. What a big mouth I have. 

You sat on the floor in front of your open window. The same window you sat at every night, asking the sky to return the person you loved. The same window that you saw the person you love walk through, leaving you and your broken heart to slowly age away and die each day. The moon would shine its light through that window every night, that light that some how gave you comfort on your darkest nights, was now covered by a cluster of dark thunderous clouds. 

You look back up at the sky, staring at the dark clouds that rolled in. 

"Why..." You whispered to yourself.

"Why do I destroy everything I love, why was i created this way? Why just why? Im so confused. I mean who am I even talking to? No one is out there and yet I still hold onto all this false made up hope that by speaking to the sky that something good would happen to me in my life." 

A small singular tear rolled down your eye. You didn't want to cry, but at the same time you could even cry if you wanted to. You were in so much pain but the tears wouldn't come. It was as if you used up all your tears and now you were left with this feeling like a hole was in your heart, a butterfly in your stomach sort of feeling was slowly pouring out of your heart and spreading throughout your chest. It was moments and feelings like these where you felt like you just wanted to give up... To give up on everything. To give up on you, him and even your own life. But would you really let you destroy yourself over someone... over him? That guy? You are left on your own sitting in the silence... 

Gosh silence is so loud. you thought to yourself.  Then your confusion comes creeping up from behind you. You are so confused that you cant even explain confusion itself. Its so hard to think about one thing at a time. Its the worst kind of confusion, the sort of confusion that gives you a headache because you are thinking too much about something you don't even truly know what you are thinking about... Thats how confused you are, thats how bad it is.  You figured you needed some rest. So you get up and grab yourself a glass of water and go to bed. 

WHACK!

You woke up to the sound in shock. Looking around the room frantically you thought someone was in your apartment.  

TAP TAP RATTLE

Still in fear you get up and rush into your lounge room only to discover that blinds of you window had burst open because of the storm outside. They continued to rattle and tap. You rolled your eyes and let out a big sigh. Deep down you were hoping and thinking maybe.. just maybe It was Peter. 

Here I am again holding onto that false hope. I must of not locked the window properly. Stupid me. You thought to yourself.

You began to walk towards the window when your feet felt cold and wet. You stopped where you were and looked down to the ground in an instant.

"FUCK!" You yelled out loud. The room was flooded. There was rain flowing in from outside and was all over the floor boards of your apartment. 

How in the fuck could all this rain get in through the window?  

Panic filled up inside you again, you rushed around the room trying to find your slippers. You didn't want the water to cause any damage and you get the blame for it. With your luck you were bound to get into some sort of trouble for the damage and you didn't want to risk that. 

You finally found your slippers and rushed to the window, you just wanted to close it before anymore rain could get in. You tried to get there as fast as you could when suddenly...

THUD!!

You slip on the water just a few meters away from the window. You tried to regain you balance but found yourself falling closer and closer to the window. 

BANG! 

Half of your body is hang over the window and your head first staring down onto the city streets. Your griping onto the bottom window frame with your hands and your arms laid side on your body. Your holding on so tight trying to keep your balance. Your legs and feet are just hovering above the floor. The window frame is wet but you putting in all the energy and strength you have in you, trying not lose your balance. You are in so much fear you can feel every heart beat, you can feel the blood rushing through your veins as your heart beats each beat. But in these moments of fear you look up over the city. You never truly took the time to look at the beauty of the city at night, you'd spend your nights looking up at the sky and never put in the time to just sit and observe how beautiful the city can be. You began to forget the situation you were in, you look up and see the clouds begin to disappear and the beauty of the night sky slowly reveal itself. It made you feel calm, it made you think of Neverland and Peter, those nights you'd spend  with him sitting in his lap on a meadow looking up at the night sky. Having his soft warm hands grip onto you as you both laughed while staring up at the sky.  You began to lose your grip, you were so caught up in your thoughts... 

The memories, those sweet beautiful memories. For once you weren't confused, the silence was no longer loud, your pain ceased to exist. You began to smile again and tears rolled down your cheeks. Everything was in slow motion. You finally let go... You let go of the window frame. You let go and began to fall but you weren't scared, you were still thinking, finally you could think again your mind wasn't fuzzy. You could finally feel again... feel real true happy emotions. You were falling to your death but in your final moments of your life were emotions of happiness. You were falling but you were looking up towards the sky and a flash of memories were projected across the night sky. You could see Peter... He was falling too, He was reaching his arms and hands out towards you. Everything was all happening in slow motion and you just smiled and closed your eyes as you reached back out to Peter... You could feel the soft warm touch of his hands gripping onto yours, as if they were real...

TO BE CONTINUED. 

Okay so yes there wasn't much of Peter in this part, I really focused on you the character, Maybe a lot of you reading this could some how relate. This was a bit dark I must admit but I guess I'm kind of talking based off emotions I've experienced though this past year. I can relate to a lot of this. 2018 has been a poop of a year and I think my future writing may be based off the experiences I've had this year. See I like to express my emotions and I'm just an open person, but I don't think writing a whole book about me and my life this year and the experiences I've had would be of much interest to people so I guess ill incorporate that into the small stories I write on here :)

also btw sorry if there are things that don't make sense in the stories or spelling errors it's like 1:28am and I'm lazy... XD

btw listen to Spotify: Deep Focus playlist when reading as I wrote this with this music. Helps paint a picture of what is going on while reading :)