𝐏𝐄𝐑𝐅𝐄𝐂𝐓

i never liked you | 6

❝i keep thinking about those times. what am i to you? i love you like crazy but do you?❞  

"jeongguk hyung, beach so pwetty." he hears the younger giggle, it made him smile. "yes, _, it's very pretty." jeongguk repeated as he stared into the sea, the water reflecting the moonlight and sparkling as the two young boys sat there. "_? what do you think we are?" jeongguk asked the other. the other didn't answer his question.

he was so quiet. jeongguk turned his head slowly to look at the other, but he wasn't there. jeongguk stared at the empty spot next to him, there was no sign that someone was there. no footprints, no handprints, no nothing. just air. 

"JEONGGUK!"

.

.

.

jeongguk sat up from his bed, almost flying off. he looked around, he was sweating. he looked at the mirror that was on the wall, his face was red, mostly his eyes, even swollen looking, had i been crying? He wiped his face with his hands and sighed. "who the hell is he?" he asked himself as he laid back down, his head hitting the pillow softly. 

jeongguk hears a knock on his bedroom door. "come in." he says as he sits up. it was jin. suddenly he thought about what had happened yesterday, how jin was... well, he probably should think about it since it was wrong, so fucking wrong. jin walked over to his bed and placed down a tray. "umm... kitchen... messy, can't eat." seokjin says as he fiddles with his fingers, seems to be a habit. jeongguk smiled softly. "thank you seokjin." he says gently.

jin seemed surprised but blushed and smiled. he bowed and before leaving the room, jeongguk called his name. "uh... seokjin, can you go call taehyung for me?" he asks the younger, seokjin shook his head. "what? why?".

"hyung, work." jin answered and left the room, closing the door behind him. "bullshit..." jeongguk cussed as he stared at the food. he or taehyung usually prepares the food and well, seokjin didn't seem the type to make food but his mouth was watering as he stared at the tray with food. it looked magnificent. he took a bite out of his breakfast.

-

seokjin sat down on the couch in the living room, learning korean. good thing he knew some of the basics and could understand, otherwise, he'd have no clue on what to say. he sees jeongguk come out of his room and into the living room, fully clothed this time. a white button up, black slacks and his hair was combed back. jin blushed but looked back down at his book.

"studying on a sunday? especially winter break? you must be kidding me." he hears jeongguk sigh as he grabs the book from seokjin, closing it and putting it in his bag. "listen here kiddo, we're gonna go get you some new clothes. so go get dressed up. seokjin stood up and walked into taehyung's room, grabbing a box that was titled 'seokjinnie's clothes'. he grabbed a pink hoodie and some black ripped jeans. 

he changed into those clothes and left taehyung's room. he saw jeongguk talking on his phone, but what he heard made him want to go eavesdrop. "w.... ta.... i need ... find him." is what he heard. i need find him? who did he need to find? jin listened silently. "taehyung, i'm serious. i had another dream about him, i NEED to find him!" jeongguk shouted quietly into his phone. 

"I may not remember his face or his name but listen here, I'm pretty damn fucking sure that i'd remember his soft voice, how he delicately spoke... or his cute little habits... goddammit, tae i just... i'm losing my mind here! i-i can't stop thinking about him, i need to find him... it's a must..." jeongguk trails off. seokjin swore he could hear some sniffles.

"listen man... i... i gotta go, jin's waiting for me. we'll talk later." jeongguk ends and hangs up. jin quickly walks away and stands by the front door, pretending as if he wasn't listening in on his conversation with taehyung. "right jin, so, you ready?" jeongguk asked the younger. "yes hyung." he answered.

the two put on their shoes and left the apartment (with jeongguk locking the door after, of course.) and went into the elevator. the two stayed quiet under the ride, honestly, it seemed like silence was loud at this point. "last night..." seokjin looks over at the older, "i... i regret it." jeongguk continues and seokjin smiles softly. he knew that it was wrong himself, but he didn't know how to deal with it, not when he was broke.

"w-we won't speak about it ever again, alright jin?" jeongguk says as he looks at the younger. jin nodded. he was sixteen and jeongguk was twenty-three, yet, jeongguk couldn't stop those unpure thoughts, his eyebrows furrow as he remembers those sounds that came out of jin's mouth. he just thanked god that it didn't go any further than a simple handjob. god, jeongguk would have killed himself, and, he wouldn't have liked to be jin's first... if he was a virgin.

jeongguk looked away as they reached the first floor. he just wanted to forget about last night, plus, he had that special someone to look for. the two left the elevator and went outside. "hey jeongguk!" he hears a low voice call out. jeongguk turns around. "namjoon hyung! it's been a while!" he smiles, a big one too. seokjin glanced over and saw his cute bunny smile, how his eyes crinkled. he looked adorable. seokjin couldn't help but imagine him without tattoos, piercings... he looked like an angel.

but he was snapped out of his thoughts when jeongguk called for him "come on jin! let's go!".

-

seokjin really liked this song that was on the radio. "jeongguk hyung... song name?" he asked the older who was driving. "it's uh... perfect by ed sheeran, if i'm correct." jeongguk answers as he parks at the mall. the two got out of the car and went inside the mall. "over here is where you can find some great clothes, especially for your build." jeongguk tells jin as they walk over to a clothing store.

"listen jinnie, the budget is 100$, alright?" he says to the younger, who looked very excited. like a kid who got an A on a test. jeongguk smiled as seokjin hurridly walked away and looked for outfits. (not forgetting to check the prices of course.)

"j-jungkook-ah?" jeongguk turns around and sees a woman. "no... jieun?" jeongguk breathes out. "it's certainly been a while... how's taehyung?" jieun asks as she smiles softly at jeongguk. "h-he's fine... what are you doing back here in seoul? i thought you weren't gonna stay in sweden until another few months?" 

jieun only smiles. "well, change of plans, i missed seoul... and i missed you too kookie." jieun sighed as she stared lovingly into jeongguk's eyes. he'd be lying if he said he wasn't surprised. "j-jieun... that was 5 years ago..." jeongguk murmured as he stared at jieun. she smiled. "i know, but, kookie, even after all that's happened... i still love you, okay kookie?" jieun said as she walked closer to jeongguk, wrapping her arms around him. inhaling his scent.

he pushed her away, "don't touch me." he hissed as he stared into her eyes hatefully. "what you did was unforgiving. well... truth be told, i never liked you anyway. you're just a little attention whore. i wanted to keep this quick and polite but obviously, you don't understand what "don't touch me ever again." means. please, good luck with your life and farewell, jieun noona." jeongguk scowled as he smiled at her.

he left the woman and saw that jin was standing there, holding clothes. it seemed that he had been listening. "don't worry jin, nothing's wrong." jeongguk smiled softly at him. jin slowly relaxed and smiled. he gave jeongguk the clothes he was holding, "oh?".

jin had chosen mostly pink clothes but there were some black, blue and some other colors in there. he couldn't help but see a skirt hiding in between two hoodies. he smirked but shook the thought of. he walked over to the cash register and put the clothes down.

-

the two were back in their apartment, putting the clothes into the laundry basket. jeongguk couldn't forget about earlier. "i never liked you anyway." fuck... he really messed up this time. jieun was the best girl he'd ever been with. oh well, he knew it was over when she turned her back on him 5 years ago.

he suddenly felt arms wrap around him, he turned his head to see jin burying his head in his shoulder. he smiled softly. he unconsciously hugged jin back, holding him gently. he can't deny the fact that he felt so close to seokjin. as if they were lost lovers or something like that. but what jeongguk heard next shocked him.

"i like you a lot, jeongguk hyung."