𝐏𝐄𝐑𝐅𝐄𝐂𝐓

the accident | 10 (1 of 2)

❝love is so painful, but goodbyes are even more painful.❞

JUNGKOOK'S POV

i stare at jieun as she flung herself onto me, her arms wrapping around my torso. obviously, i felt uncomfortable. i tensed up as she hugged me tighter, i tried shifting in my place a little, hoping that she'd notice. she pulled back and smiled brightly at me, but i know that was just a big mask. 

"funny to see you here kookie! i thought you never wanted to see your dad after that," she said as she grabbed a glass of champagne from a servant that passed by. i scoffed, "funny, yeah right." i scowled. "aww, don't be so mad kookie! it'll be fine!" jieun hummed as she took a sip from her champagne. i only looked at her in distaste, "not be mad? how could i not be mad? being forced to come here doesn't seem like a thing to be happy over." i snapped as i crossed my arms, leaning a little to the right, most of my weight going that direction.

she grinned, "trust me, you'll wish you never even said that. your dad has really changed! the accident is LONG gone, so, you don't have to worry about anything happening once again." she chirped as she caressed my arm. i cringed.

"we'll see." i answered harshly as i walked away from her, going to the living room. i see some familiar faces but most of my memories of them are blurred. fucking accident.

the two females see me and walk towards me, smiling, "jeongguk! it's been awhile, how have you been?" the older, shin jimin, asks. i smile gently, "i've been better." i answer honestly, she chuckles, "of course.". the other female, kim seolhyun only smiles. i only remember their age and names, but we seem to be close by how they act. 

"well, enjoy the party, ladies." i beamed as i left the living room, walking upstairs to escape the little ball. i walk over to my room and open the bedroom door, stepping inside and closing the door behind me. "the accident..." i mumble as i walk over to my bed, propping myself on the large bed and closing my eyes.

-

i stare at myself in the mirror, naked with only a towel hanging loosely over my waist, hiding my private part. i'm skinny, pale, bruises everywhere. god, i looked like i was fucking lifeless. i stare at the scars on my bony chest. you could practically see my ribs when i would stretch, it was disgusting.

but i was never the one to do anything about it. it's my fault i even did this to myself. i'm 15 years old, i need to get a grip on reality but that doesn't ever seem to work out. i chuckle airily as i run my fingers through my wet hair.

there were so many wrongs about me, and there still is. it's been two years since i've last seen the little boy, i really wish i could go protect him, but of course my parents had to rip me and him apart after he found out that he was 'poor' meaning he was dirty and filthy, god that left me fucking enraged but i couldn't do anything about it.

i stare into my mismatched eyes. the right eye a white, grayish color, the pupil smaller than it should be. i hated it, i hate how i couldn't see from both my eyes. goddammit, he fucking fucked up everything.

i turn off the lights and leave the bathroom, walking into my cold, icy bedroom. i felt so small.

i dress up in a black t-shirt, black ripped jeans, finishing off with hiding my right eye with my fringe. it's ugly.

i grabbed my phone and left my room, walking downstairs and going to the dining room. i see jieun sitting and eating, alone. i walk towards her and sit down next to her, "where're my parents?" i ask her as i stare at her face, "they went out on a business trip, i was going to tell you but you were sleeping! i couldn't help but leave you be." she beamed and smiled happily.

i smiled back at her, happily.

-

i stand defenselessly as 3 older men stare at me, their eyes looking at me as if i were their prey, and they were hungry wolves. i hate how weak i am, why can't they just leave me alone? 

i stare at them in disgust, but what came next left me shocked. i fell down on my side, rather brutally, my cheek burning and hurting like hell. one of them punched me. i stand up slowly as i shakily hold my cheek, "don't fucking look at me like that!" asshole #1 barked as he stared at me, his face fuming red. i chuckled, "oh i fucking will, you're nothing but a disgusting asshole, hey! bet your mothers a fucking bitch too!" i insulted as i stood there idly, waiting for another attack.

but he just stared at me, i smirked, "come on, hit me in the face." i goaded as i tilted my head. the person on the right tackled me, hitting me repeatedly in the face, right, left, right, left, you know? but i didn't feel scared, i didn't feel horrified, in fact, i felt euphoric, ecstatic. maybe i can finally die.

i only grinned, asshole #2 never stopped until asshole #3 came in and pulled him back, shouting something like, "dude, are you crazy? don't kill him!".

i propped myself up on my elbows, my lip busted, cheek had a cut, eye almost mangled. i only laughed, "come on! i know you want to!" i seethed as my fringe moved, making them see the blind eye. they only looked at me in terror, as if i was some sort of abnormal creature. ironic as it's them who attacked me first.

i stood up and pulled out the gun i had hidden and i made sure that it was loaded. i stood up and aimed the gun at them, i was lost. my mind was nowhere near sane, i lost it. whatever made me sane, only dissipated and was replaced with hatred and fuming anger.

the three men got onto their knees and started praying, begging for me to let them go. but no way was i going to do that, they had their chance to end me. they started it.

like the saying, 'you have to finish what you started'. i pulled the trigger and the bullet went right through asshole #1's forehead, the two others tried running away but i shot them in their legs before they could get away. the two fell down and i only stomped on their wounds, making sure to put all of my weight onto the hurt leg, their agonizing screams making me feel an epiphany. i dropped the gun, and stepped back. "what the fuck?" was all i could let out as i stared at what i had done, terrified.

i was a freak.

i just killed, not just one, but THREE people. i fled the area as i heard footsteps nearing this way. i only ran and ran. i ran across the road, but to no avail, i didn't look. i didn't care, fuck, i deserve to die, but then jieun flashed inside of my mind.

"JUNGKOOK! LOOK O-"