Chapter Thirty Eight (Gerard)

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Gerard wasn't used to sleeping in an open space where others would be able to hear his nightly conversations with Frank. Maybe if it were under other circumstances he wouldn't have mined, but unfortunately he and the others weren't allowed to stay in the infirmary forever and had to sleep on bunks like the other rebels.

It wasn't that bad as they were all in the same area, but Gerard would've liked more privacy where not everyone was being quiet as to hear whatever he or Frank had to say. Apparently, being the new leaders of the rebels came with popularity and everyone wanted to learn whatever they could of the two.

Unfortunately, Frank didn't seem to care as he whispered to Gerard anyways while the man attempted to sleep. Instead of having the top bunk as he should, Frank crawled onto Gerard's bunk and squeezed in beside him.

"Gee?" "Yes Frankie?" "Um," Frank shifted until he was comfortable, his nose just centimeters from Gerard's. He could feel Frank's breath against his skin as the man whispered to him. "Wisdom for sleep?" "Alright. Today's wisdom..." Frank often asked Gerard for random thoughts of his, which Frank called 'Wisdom for sleep.' And usually Gerard would tell him something that left him thinking until adventually, well, he'd fall asleep.

It was cute as Frank always slept before Gerard and Gerard would be left smiling as his boyfriend would cuddle against him and dream of whatever Frank liked to dream about. Usually he'd mumble things that went along with whatever conversation they'd previously have, or say Gerard's name-which honestly, was very adorable.

"Well, what are your concerns?" "I'm...Afraid one of us are going to die or get hurt." Frank admitted in a low whisper. "Frank, I'm sure neither of us will die, but if we do, just know that we're doing it for a cause, right?" "What if that cause isn't good enough? What if I'm greedy and I don't want to lose you or don't want to die though I know it's for a purpose?" Frank pressed.

This, finally getting Gerard's attention, made him smile somewhat as he loved answering questions without answers. "Frank, there's a lot of things we have to sacrifice and a lot of people we have to lose in order to do what's right. Patrick knew he could die, Patrick was aware of his sacrifices, why do you think he made them?"

"B-Because he was a kind per-"

"That too, Frank. But it was because he put himself second and others first. Patrick was aware of all the things he could lose, but he also knew all the effects in which could be caused by his refusal to act. Now, let's go back to us. You, Frankie, love me to death. You cannot bear the thought of losing me. But if I were to die to save thousands-perhaps millions of lives, would you let me?"

"Uh-"

"No. Because you love me too much. But I know what I'm doing and I know I can die from it. I know it would hurt you if I die, but I'll still die knowing that you cared for me enough to not want to lose me. I know, with all my heart, that I love you too and would do anything to save your life. Even die for you. So think of it like this Frankie; no matter what happens, no matter whether you lose me or not, I'll still die knowing that I love you and that I'd sacrifice anything for you-and all of these amazing people right now."

"Why didn't that make me feel better?" Frank asked, sniffling a little as he buried his head in Gerard's shoulder. "Because you're my Frankie and my Frankie is an emotional little bean." He kissed Frank lightly, vowing to protect him at any costs. Fuck what he just said, Gerard would do anything to protect Frank, risk anything to keep Frank safe.

In the mists of his own thoughts, he suddenly looked down to see Frank murmuring and snuggling into Gerard's chest. The man's fingers grazing over his shirt while he used his arm as a shoulder and nuzzled his head into Gerard.

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