Chapter 5 (part I)

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"Jesus! How can you be so stupid?" Nellie flung up her hands. "When did you even have time to start liking him? It wasn't even a date. How much time did you spend together?"

Arina pondered.

"Probably an hour. Maybe two. I don't remember," her voice cracked again as though she suffered from a sore throat or bronchitis.

"See? You don't even remember!" Nellie nodded. "That shows that nothing terrible has happened."

"But I remember him," Arina croaked, looking depressed. Nellie stood there, deep in thought. She saw that when Arina came home yesterday, she wasn't quite herself. She didn't talk to Nellie and didn't even look at her. She came home, went straight to the bathroom and started crying, or at least that is what it seemed like. Then, Arina went to bed, but at night, she started crying again — quietly like a lost kitten. Nellie tried to question her but she only said that nothing was wrong and that there was nothing to worry about. But when morning came and Nellie found the sink full of dirty dishes, she became really worried.

"Has someone hurt you? Have you been robbed? Are you sick? Has someone died? Have you found an abandoned puppy?" Nellie asked a million questions, worried about her girlfriend. Arina shook her head, turned away to face the wall, and pulled the blanket over her head. In the end, when it turned out that Arina's tears, the sleepless night and dirty dishes were all because of some photographer, Nellie burst out laughing.

"My God, this is ridiculous! All this because of a man?"

"No!" Arina almost yelled at her. "You don't understand!"

"Of course. How could I? What happened? Was it love at first sight? Wow! Finally! We were beginning to think that you were a robot or an alien, and that you simply don't have a heart. So, was it a handsome prince in a white Mercedes? Now tell me that he's special, there's no one else like him, and that your heart is broken."

"Nothing's broken," Arina muttered wearily. The sleepless night was finally catching up with her; her head was spinning and her brain was so foggy and scattered that she couldn't even finish a sentence.

"You bet it isn't!" Nellie exclaimed. "Because it takes more than a couple of hours to have your heart broken. It's all hormones. You have never experienced anything like this before, right? That's why you feel this way. The truth is that you'll have hundreds of men like him. Forget about him."

"I already have! I am . . ." Arina nodded eagerly. She had been dreaming about his face all night, his beautiful face. Was it really a dream or was she hallucinating? His crazy eyes; she was looking into them, and it felt as if she were jumping off a cliff with a parachute. The thought of him took her breath away. If she surrendered to delusion, she could even recall that subtle, pleasant smell, his smell.

"Good girl. Come here and I'll make you some tea or something." Nellie got two cups out of the sink, filled them to the brim and started washing them, splashing water around. Arina jumped up and pushed her aside.

"Let me." Nellie didn't stop her. This was even better since Arina was usually responsible for the cleaning, doing the dishes, and other house chores. Nellie was responsible for paying the electricity and water bills although they were relatively small.

"So," Nellie clapped her hands together, "if you have already forgotten about him, why are you still crying? Tell the old snail what the problem is. It didn't work out between you and this . . . Oh well, to hell with him!"

"I don't understand why he decided to run after me in the first place," Arina finally found the courage to open up. She needed someone to talk to, and Nellie, all other things aside, knew a lot about men. Like it or not, there was no denying that she had that about her. She knew how to draw a man to her with a single gesture, one glance, one grin, and how to make him dance to her tune, and even how to make him pay for a night with her. Arina was shocked by such a pragmatic approach and yet . . . She couldn't imagine that anybody in their right mind would want to pay to spend the night with her, the pale and awkward shadow that she was.

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