(dream/flashback)
I sat bored, twiddling my thumbs with Averton watching T.V, we were supposed to go out but he wants to stay in. All of a sudden, my phone went off. I looked down at it, feeling his eyes on my phone also. Gi said come over and since I weren't doing much, I decided I would. I stood up to go.
"Aye av, I'm bout to go to Gi's baby" I smiled at him, grabbing my coat from the hook.
"Nahhhhh, you not doing that" he whined standing up grabbing me by my waist. I giggled into the crook of his neck.
"I am thoughhhhh" I said playfully hitting him.
"You really ain't though" he said after laughing. His voice started to get more stern.
"Bye Averton" I brushed it off laughing blowing a kiss. I was about to open the door, before I felt a sting on my wrist. I saw avertons hands grasped around my arm tightly, I looked up at him and he looked serious.
"How do I know you ain't fucking any niggas behind my back Maeve" he said pulling me closer quickly with force. I felt his airy breath on my shoulder.
"What the fuck you know full well I ain't boutta do that" I responded madly. I'm a loyal hitch. For him to say that is fucking infuriating. Why he putting his hands on me though he ain't never done that before.
Before I knew it, he threw a punch to me cheek. I fell to the ground in pain, grabbing my face noticing my nose was bleeding and it felt broken. Blood began to pour out from my nose. I looked up at him horrified, with dry eyes.
"The fuck you doing" I growled, disgusted that he would ever lay a finger on me, he ain't never acted like this before. Inside I want to cry so bad, how could he?
"Maeve baby I'm so sorr-" he cried, tears falling down his face before I cut him off.
"So you on that women beater shit now?" I asked laughing furiously, "Punk ass nigga, the fuck"
He tried to grab me by my waist, I pushed him away. He looked equally as horrified as I felt, tugging on his hair.
I walked over to him slowly, wiping the blood from my face. "DONT YOU EVER HANDLE A WOMEN LIKE THAT" I screamed, getting up in his face. He winced at my voice, crying hysterically. He tried to pull me back, but I shook him off running out the door. I slammed the door, running to my car not looking back. I heard him call my name but I just blanked it. I opened my car door quickly, my hands shaking, and sat in it.
I paused for a while, trying to establish everything that had just happened. I opened my car mirror, looking at the sight of my nose. It was bent the wrong way, and blood was all over my face. I began to cry, looking at the sight of me. I kicked the seat screaming. How could he? How the fuck could he do that?
(Dream over)
I woke up suddenly, panting. I lifted my arm and felt my head sweating. My legs were sweating in my shorts and my whole body was shaking intensely. I just dreamt about the first ever time he hit me. The first time I let him get away with it. The first time that my life was consumed, by him.
I reached over to my phone, still breathing heavily and noticed that it was 03:46am in the morning. I close my eyes in despair, placing my phone back on my desk not moving from the bed. I haven't had a nightmare in so long. I usually just don't dream in general to be honest, which is how I like it. I believe that is what life after death is, just nothing forever. Typically the thought of how long forever is terrifies me but at the moment, the thought of nothingness forever seems not that bad. The leading up to death scares me, the physical pain. Which is why i decided to overdose only last week, a peaceful death where i just fell asleep forever. Until Gi woke me up. Don't get me wrong, I'm incredibly thankful for that. But sometimes i have a tiny bit of me inside that wishes I wasn't disturbed.
