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maya

i was in the shower listening to my 'in my feels' playlist and thinking, there was never really a time where i had a good week or month. shit always happened to me, and people really think my life's good it's not. i always put up a face where i'm happy 24/7 and my life's going great, but i cry myself to sleep every single day. it's really tough but i mean it is what it is. my mom doesn't wanna say anything but i know we're struggling, my dads a lawyer but he and my mom divorced and he took everything🤷🏾‍♀️ he knew my mom had a drug addiction a while back and she's trying to get a job but nobody wants an ex addict as their coworker. my dad doesn't call anymore, probably doesn't want anything to do with us. me included, shit that's why i get good grades and focus on track. to help my momma when my father couldn't, i put more stress on her head with all the shit i put her through when i was younger, but now i'm trying my best so that my mother doesn't have to worry about anything.

"maya if you don't get yo ass out the washroom!" she said. 

"sorry ma, i'm getting out."

i got out the shower and did my hygiene. when i got out i went down stairs to the kitchen.

"mama, i'm gonna get a job." i said opening the fridge to barely anything, i saw a couple eggs and grabbed them out.

"no you ain't child, i need you to focus on school, and track only. forget about a job." i shook my head.

"but mama, i'm almost 17 i need to help you out someway, i can't just be sitting here while you do all this work."

"hush, i'm doing this because i love you. and it ain't your place."

"and imma get a job because i love you, it's not okay that i'm not helping you to pay some bills in this house." i created my sandwich and sat on the table.

"it's nothing for you to worry about." she replied.

"but i do have good news! i'm going back to school to finish up school for social work." she said.

i jumped up and literally gave her the biggest hug ever. "really ma! omg i'm so happy for you!! we won't be struggling no more." i said the last part quietly.

she looked at me funny, "girl who said we were ever struggling?" did she not see our fridge? or the fact that the lights cannot be turned on for more than 5 minutes. or the fact that i can't be in the shower for long? okay shordy, i guess we were ever struggling.

"aight ma. but i'm so happy for you!" she gave me a kiss on the cheek and i returned it.

"yeah, yeah. hurry up so i can take you to school." i grabbed my backpack and got into the car.

when i got to school i kept to my self when someone grabbed me by the waist. i back hand slapped the person and realized it was tjay.

"damn ma! why you hittin' a nigga like dat? slapping me so damn hard." he was rubbing his cheek. he pulled me again giving me a hug, pushing me against the locker.

"sorry! ian know it was you." i mumbled in his neck acting all shy.

he gripped my neck, "you gone have to make it up to me." he smirked.

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