I'm With You - SwaSan SS ✓

Part Three |

Shock would be an understatement to describe Sanskar's state when Dr. Mukherji told him about Swara having panic attack. Witnessing Kavita's death had left him with nightmares and panic attacks. This term, reasons and issues related with it were not new to him.

The fact that surprised him the most was that it was Swara. Sanskar never imagined someone as bubbly, as chirpy as Swara could have skeletons hidden in her closet. Skeletons of her past those were dark enough to scare her to the point of losing it.

"How?" Sanskar managed to utter. His brain had stopped working and all he could do was to stare at doctor for providing him better insight on Swara's condition.

Doctor sighed heavily. She had decided to trust the young man standing in front of her. "It all started 10 years ago. Swara was only 10 years old. One incident, which happened back then, turned her whole life upside down. Her childhood was snatched away from her and overnight she became mature than her age."

Sanskar felt chills going down his spine. For some unknown reasons he had sinking feeling in his heart.

"The age in which a child should play and live his or her life freely, Swara had locked herself in the shell. She never demanded anything. She used to be silent all the time. Until now no one knows about the pain she had suffered and was suffering due to that one incident. Not even her family members are aware about it." Doctor Mukherji caressed Swara's hair gently. Behind her spectacles, Sanskar could see the moisture pooled in her eyes.

"We had worked very hard and were successful to bring her back to normal. But from what happened today, I think that whole hard work went in vain. Do you really want to know about her past? Is it out of love for her or out of guilt?" Dr. Mukherji asked looking into Sankar's eyes.

She knew it was love, still she wanted to confirm. Swara was like a daughter to her rather than being patient. Hence sharing Swara's life to stranger was never acceptable to her. She wanted to be sure. Moreover, she wanted to make sure that with the person she was sharing could help in healing Swara rather than making matters more worse.

Sanskar didn't know what to say by the little summary he received. When he was asked about his feelings, he at first was very angry. Because his love was being labeled as guilt but when he looked in Dr. Mukherji's eyes, somewhere he felt that the lady was really concerned for Swara. He could clearly see worry swirling in her eyes.

Sanskar sat beside Swara's sleeping form, holding her palm in his. He glanced towards Swara, caressing her hair, softly, with his free hand.

He whispered slowly, afraid it would disturb Swara even though he knew she wouldn't be able to hear him. "Yes, I'm guilty for what she has suffered today. I'm guilty for not being beside her when she needed me. But my concern, my worry, and my love for her are not out of any guilt. Yes I want to know the reasons. But that's not out of any guilt. It is because I want to help in healing her. I want to erase all the bad memories from her life and fill her life with happiness... only happiness and love."

Sanakar's own eyes turned misty. He was not the one for talking cheesy stuffs and emotional confessions. After Kavita's death he had turned into more reserved person. The love, emotions held no value for him. He believed in practicality and was driven my hate. Love had lost all the meaning for him.

However, Swara changed his perspective. She brought him back to humanity and thus confessing something like this, even to the outsider came naturally to him. He didn't feel any awkwardness. If anything, it was only remorse.

"Maine jis Swara se pyaar kiya hai, mai us Swara ko wapas laana chahta hu... Mai uski khushi dil se chahta hu kisi guilt ki wajah se nahi," Sanskar confessed looking straight in Dr. Mukherji's eyes.