sandglass ⏳ wanna one

⏳ - ✒

켜줘 (light)

"stop crying, please."

"i will fight those bad guys for you, where are they?"

"you're so dirty, dont touch me!"

"why are you such a brat!"

"i dont even know her,"

"hyelin? who's that?"

do you remember these words? it's funny how our words-- your words, cut through me like a knife when it shouldn't have even mattered.

because i never mattered.

i was hurt when you denied me as a friend. but i found out i had no choice.

i was the only one who treated you as a friend, and you didnt even ask me to do that.

there was definitely no point in asking you to come back and be friends with me.

i just want to look back on these words you told me before.

i was hurt, im still hurting and i'll always be hurt.

but it was my inspiration. the ones that helped me learn.

learn how to let go of you.

"stop crying, please."

that was when we met each other for the first time. at the ice cream parlor, remember?

that time, our family dog died. it was like a bestfriend to me because i took care of it since it was a pup.

you gave me your ice cream cup as an offering, thinking you made me cry.

we became friends that day.

"i will fight those bad guys for you, where are they?"

this was when some group of guys chased me. i was crying so hard that time,

i thought i was going to lose you.

to be honest, i wasnt scared of death eversince. why? simply because, i already prepared for it.

you were young but you wanted to protect me. and i was freaking scared,

what if you saw them? what if you chased after them?

i couldnt afford losing you.

they can get me, just please not you.

"you're so dirty, dont touch me!"

this was when you saw me with one of your friends.

my first betrayal.

he held my hand, told your school i was his girl. but it wasnt true.

he wanted to put on a show because he was secretly hating on you.

he wanted your fame and he thought getting to me was one way to steal what he wanted from you.

i warned you but you told me to stop. to stop ruining your friendship with him and that i should just leave your life.

i didnt though, and that's where your next words came in.

"why are you such a brat!"

i was sad, it was my second betrayal. why would a friend of mine treat me that way?

but then again, i remembered.

i didnt matter to anyone.

it's painful to think that the people who give importance to others is the one who doesnt get what they deserve.

afterall, what they say is true.

you give to others what you want to receive with a mindset thinking that maybe, just maybe, someday they'd treat you the same.

"i dont even know her,"

my third betrayal. you denied me infront of your school's cafeteria.

everyone found out the guy and i were dating.

when he knew i squeezed the juice to you, he flipped the story and said i seduced him.

it didnt hurt me. the fact that i was turned to be the one who did wrong.

the only thing that hurt me was that you believed him, and not me.

who was i anyway? a girl older than him who thought i got his side always?

well, i knew i was no one.

but at that moment,

i atleast wished that i was someone in his life.

"hyelin? who's that?"

my fourth and last betrayal.

you were at the school park with your new friends. you were sitting beside a girl who was high class, popular and beautiful.

i bitterly smiled to myself.

right, who am i in this world?

who am i in your life?

for the second time, you denied me.

so i finally decided.

i left you.

i left you who became the light when my life was in the darkness.

i left you who gave me hope to continue even with the pressure in life.

i left you who turned his back on me.

i left you who shut the light out of my life to blind me.