All I Give

Chapter 25 - He Wasn't The Man I Thought He Was

His eyes roamed Izzy's apartment as if it had been the first time he had been there. He scanned over every piece of furniture, slithered his fingertips over her tabletops, and watched the view from her living room window.

"I really like this apartment, maybe we should move in with each other." He leaned forward nodding with wide eyes.

She scoffed in disbelief, "you live in a mansion and you're telling me you want to live in this small box?" She put her hands on her hips and furrowed her brows.

"Imagine living in a huge box that's beautifully constructed but no one is inside but you." His jaw clenched then gulped. His eyes glossed with deep sorrow, "all there's left is an empty box."

Izzy nodded and pressed her lips together. "Let's just go ahead and do our homework. We shouldn't waste time." She grabbed her backpack and took out her stuffed binder, so did he.

Eventually, as time passed both of them would glance at each other than look away quickly. The air filled with awkwardness.

"I'm going to the bathroom, be right back." Her plump lips curved into a small smile. It seemed genuine to Cole and smiled back, except with his eyes instead.

He fell over onto her bed and rested his head behind his two interlocked hands. His smirk grew as he thought about hugging and cuddling her. "I wished you liked me." He sighed groaning loudly.

He sat up and scanned her room more closely. At first glance, everything seemed too plain, too elegant, too tidy. What caught his attention was the fairy lights on her walls hanging from her photographs and memories.

One photo had Bailey, Spencer, and Izzy hugging tightly smiling with radiating joy. They looked as if they were young freshmen. It's almost as if he could feel the happiness coming from the picture.

Strangely enough, only Bailey, Spencer, Payton, Trevor, Carson, and Cole were on her wall. Were the ones hung on her wall really the only people who mattered in her life?

He shifted his thinking onto her small desk. He sat in her chair and started opening and closing drawers. The first four drawers were filled with school supplies, art supplies, and studying materials. The last drawer on the bottom to the left was filled to the brim with drawings. Artworks that nobody but herself could see.

She had drawn her heart and feelings when she couldn't express them. Her soul was tethered to the pages of her sketchbook and her mind could finally clear as she held her pencil.

In one of her drawings, there was a little girl inside of a black ocean. The waves were calm but the girl was sinking to the bottom with a lifeless expression. There were ankle restraints with a weight that constantly kept the girl from fighting.

Cole's hand traced every outline, every rough sketch, every emotion that was displayed on that piece of paper.

He could feel his own heartbreak at the sight of someone suffering on this page.

He quickly put back the artwork and opened the last bottom right drawer. He was puzzled and surprised. There were letters piled together but none were opened. Cole's jaw tensed at the sight of those letters.

Why were they unopened?

Who sent them?

Cole searched for the date of those letters and some were fairly recent, sent about a month or two ago. Some letters were sent four years ago and yet no reply.

Why did this person persistently send letters every month or two?

The door suddenly opened and Izzy stood there with a petrified expression. Her fists clutched and her eyebrows furrowed. She stomped her way forward to snatch the letters out of Cole's hands and slammed the bottom drawer.

"Why were you snooping around?!" She bottled with anger and frustration.

"You snooped around in my room as well." Cole felt guilty but defended his actions instead.

Izzy sighed in defeat. The room became silent.

She played with her fingers and bit her lip harshly, "just ask what you want to ask. I know you have questions."

"I'm not always curious. I don't always need to know." He tried reassuring her but it didn't do much to her satisfaction.

"Ask away, I'll answer truthfully. I know your dying inside to know. Detectives always search for the answer no matter how annoying they get." She loosened her shoulders while he became stiff as a log.

"Who sent you those letters?" He witnessed the anguish written on her face. It burned a heart within his own heart to see that.

Izzy's breath was taken away from her. The palms of her hands began to sweat and her back chilled as if she was in the snow with nothing on. She took a large breath in to steady her breathing, "my dad."

"Why did you never open them?"

"We don't have a good relationship. We aren't close, so why should I open letters from him? I know it sounds harsh, selfish, and ungrateful to say this... but he doesn't deserve any of my love." She couldn't directly say it while holding eye contact so instead she stared at her bed, looking down.

"He must have really hurt you if you left all of his letters unread." He eyed her.

"Very true. I want to forget everything but I can't. My mind won't let me, instead, it replays all of the nightmares." She crinkled her nose while running her hands through her hair.

"I'm sorry." His voice was quiet, filled with regret and guilt.

Izzy smiled but he couldn't quite figure out if it was genuine or fake. "What are you sorry for? Are you sorry for all the hurt he caused me? Or are you sorry for looking through my items without permission?"

"Both."

She moved closer to him and patted his head. "You're forgiven. Just don't do it again."

"I won't! I promise." He gave an enchanting smile. "But, can you just tell me why you hate your dad?"

"He ruined my childhood. He lied more than Pinocchio, but when he told the truth it was quite brutal. I could handle it now but it teared up my kid self." Her voice was shaky but still a visible smile on her lips.

"He doesn't sound like a very nice guy." They both laughed. Jokes in the worst situations always are funnier.

"You know, parents are meant to preserve their child's or children's lives for as long as possible. My father did the opposite, he took away my innocence by showing me how cruel the world really was."

"Maybe he was doing that to protect you, tough love?"

"Don't try to justify his actions. I never want to talk to him again so let's just say I'll never be able to ask him the reason for why he basically mentally abused me as a kid."

"Your relieved you got out of your father's gasp."

"Of course I am. If I didn't I would be in Hell." Again, another smile. Why smile when your in pain?

"That's a bold statement." A smile poked from his lips. He readjusted his fluffy hair.

"Well, I didn't always use to hate him."

"How so?"

"I actually used to look up to him. He's a big-time lawyer. But let's just say he wasn't who I thought he was."

"You don't have to answer this, but where is your mom in the picture?"

"She was also deceived by him."

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SORRY I HAVNT BEEN UPDATING
SCHOOL HAS GOTTEN ME REALLT BUSY