Into The Dream Scape

Part 1: For What is Recovery?

      Allison's POV
    They finally brought him out of the OR and into the ICU, I'm worried out of my fucking mind and I don't know what I'm going to do if he isn't okay. I sit, waiting. By this time his mom and sister had arrived at the hospital and came to his room with me, we sit in silence. The only sound in the room was his raspy breath and the slow beeping of the heart monitor. I am sad....
    I'm lost, honestly lost. I hold his hand, noticing how the light enters and fades from the window every day and night. He's unmoving, he looks, peaceful, but, not in a good way. Like it was forced upon him, and he's in pain. You can see the outline of all the stitches under his gown and sheets. His bruises have started to barely fade, and sometimes he screws up his face and groans, and Everytime, I get my hopes that he's waking up, but he never does. I haven't slept in several days, and when I do, it's in short bursts. The sound of the explosion continues to ring in my ears, echoing in my mind constantly.
    I don't even know what time it is. I don't what day it is either. Time is passing so slowly, but everything is happening so fast as well. One moment, everything was fine. We we're happy, together, laughing, and the next, here we are....

    Soon enough though, I find myself dreaming of the whole thing again. The feel of his grip loosening as the concrete falls on his body, the sound of bones being crushed and my head throbbing in pain. I feel it, see it, hear it, I can taste the dust in my mouth as I clawed my way through the rubble.

    I feel a tight squeeze on my hand, and I open my eyes to see two more staring at the ceiling in fear.
"Nate!" I nearly screamed at the top of my lungs in joy that he's awake.
"A-allison?...." He tries to sit up but fails, exclaiming in pain as he does so.
"Stay there, I'll tell them you're awake." I stand up, yelling at the nurse in the hallway before sitting back down.
"You got hurt really bad, babe. We we're in an explosion, and well, they don't know if you're going to be able to use your left leg anymore...." I tell him, I see the look on his face drop.
"B-but, my classes, our relationship, my job, what about the animals? Our family?! How can I get anything accomplished if I can't move around?!" He's crying suddenly.
"It's ok! It's ok! Calm down, we'll figure everything out, but for now you need to calm down, Nate." I put my hand in his hair, and play with it, that usually calms him down, and it down.
   After a few minutes, the beeping slows back down to its normal pace and he's wiping the last of the tears from his face, just in time for the doctor to come in. They check over his vitals first, then move on to seeing if he'll be able to use his leg again, they tried a variety of things to get his nerves to react, though it wasn't much, it did twitch and jerk away every few times, meaning that it was possible for him to use it again, eventually.
      Nate's POV
    I WANT TO LEAVE.
    I have been stuck in this hospital bed for I don't know how long, they won't let me get up, and I'm not allowed to move anything below the waist, so I'm stuck on my back.
    I think the worst thing about this is the fact that I can't shower. I have to be sponge bathed, and it's fucking annoying. I feel useless....
    I suddenly feel the urge to find something sharp, I haven't felt it in years, so I don't know why I felt it for that split second. I promised Allison I'd never resort to such a thing again. And I won't. And with that reminder, I pushed the thought to the back of mind and started listening to the doctor again.

"We'll start your physical therapy tomorrow , it'll all be in bed for the first three weeks, stretches for your muscles so they don't deteriorate. After three weeks, you can start SLOWLY moving about the room with assistance, once we know you can use your leg and your chest won't collapse again, we'll discharge you. You'll be on crutches for a month after, and then a supportive cane for at least a year before you can fully use your leg again as you did before." He, the doctor stated, his voice laced with pity for me, which I despised, I felt a fire rise in my body, I wanted to punch him. 

    I'll recover before a full year passes. I will make it! These fools can't keep me tied her, if I could, I'd burn this place to the ground! I'M TIRED OF THESE BLANK WALLS! I WANT MY CAT! I WANT MY HOME! I WANT MY FAMILY!

"Ok...." Is all I could say, I looked away and out the window, I told Allison to go back to go school, she's missed about three weeks now even though she's been doing assignments online, she still needs to go to class eventually. I'm alone here right now. I can't reach my phone and it bugs me. The only channels on TV are kids shows and the news, nothing interesting, So I've resorted to counting windows on buildings in the distance, the amount of a certain colour car I see pass in the streets below.  

    I want to go home. They moved me out of the ICU last week. The room looks the same, but this one has thinner curtains, a couch, a table, and a larger tv. The walls, door, floor, ceiling, bed, decorations, all the same. I hate it here.

So, I said I was going to work on this over Spring Break, and I didn't.... I just want to say sorry for not, I got caught up. I did a lot of driving at home, and then went on my school band trip....  Thanks for understanding, my daily updates will start again sometime this week!