The flaws in Park Chanyeol

Eight.

That night, Baekhyun lies in bed alone at Joo Sung's house, staring at the ceiling and hands linked together, lying on his stomach. The night is empty and silent and devoid of Chanyeol's usual shifting and occasional snoring. He misses that. He misses that presence that had used to be a big bother and burden to him, but is now something that he can't sleep well without.

Chanyeol and Kyungsoo ... He closes his eyes, trying to push down the pain that comes with the fact that Chanyeol is quickly slipping away from his fingers and slowly turning into someone else's. He closes his eyes, imagining Chanyeol's gentle actions towards someone else, Chanyeol's bright smile as he looks at Kyungsoo like there's no one else in the world. He imagines the way Chanyeol would hold Kyungsoo protectively and shield him away from harm, like he had done with Baekhyun. He imagines Chanyeol stealing kisses from an unsuspecting Kyungsoo in the hallway, Chanyeol holding Kyungsoo's hand shamelessly in public, Kyungsoo pecking Chanyeol on the cheek during nights where they're too busy to speak, heated arguments that always ended in gentleness, and shy flirting that always brought the two of them closer together. They're perfect together, and Baekhyun is happy for Chanyeol if that ever happens.

But still, his heart throbs with pain at the thought, a pain sharp and overwhelming, a pain that stems from the ugliest feeling in his heart, the type of jealousy that forces him to believe that no one can ever be as good for Chanyeol as he is, and also the type of reluctant jealousy that is more sad than it is resentful.

Baekhyun wants so bad to just tear himself away from this nightmare, go back to Chanyeol, and explain to him what's happening. But even so, what he's done has hurt Chanyeol deeply and when Chanyeol needed him most, he wasn't there. For that, Baekhyun doesn't deserve him.

I want to go. Baekhyun thinks to himself, shutting his eyes as his mind urges his body to move, to pack up and leave and never come back. I want to go back to him.

Fear claws into his heart and suddenly reality hits him hard. He'll never have Chanyeol again. Chanyeol will never love him again. If this mission is successful and Baekhyun is allowed to go back, he'll have to endure every day watching Chanyeol fall in love with someone else.

He sits up suddenly, slides off his bed and rushes to his suitcase. Fuck, he can't do this anymore. He can't just sit here and wait for Chanyeol to fall in love with someone else. He can't act anymore. Even in the dark, Baekhyun flips open his suitcase, reaching around him to grab his clothes to stuff it in. He wants to kiss this mission goodbye and go back to where everything was easy.

The moment the suitcase opens, Baekhyun falters.

Even in the darkness, Baekhyun can make out his shape. Chan Chan is lying there innocently, and Baekhyun had forgotten him because his mission took up so much of his tired mind. With shaking fingers, Baekhyun reaches out and grabs Chan Chan's soft arm, then pulls him to his chest. He shuts his eyes tightly, pulling Chan Chan close and tight, just like how Chanyeol would hold him whenever Chanyeol wanted him to know that there was at least one person in the world that loved him. Then he remembers why he's doing this.

Chanyeol protected me. Baekhyun thinks, gasping and pushing back tears that threaten to fall out. It's my turn to protect him.

Is it worth it? He wants to yell at himself. Chanyeol's out there, about to love someone else, and you're here with the person you hate the most.

Just get people to throw him in jail, you've got the money. The desperate part of him argues. It's fine. Just back out now, go back to him. You'll still have him.

No. Baekhyun takes a deep breath and loosens his hold on Chan Chan. If Joo Sung evaded the police once, he can do it again. We have to catch him off guard. I have to make him believe he's won, and then go in for the kill. I can't ever risk Chanyeol to be broken by him.