Ten Random Characters

Pit Fails at Life

Ten Random Characters

Chapter 4

"Seven, Eight, and Three are at war with One, Four, and Six," Lucas read.

"So, that's- let's see," Peach glanced at her list. "Ike, Red, and Pit at war with Palutena, Marth, and Robin."

"Marth, why would you fight against your Waifu?" Palutena asked with a giggle.

She was met with a snap of Marth's fingers, and suddenly, Lucina rushed in and slammed the goddess on the head with a pillow. "You shall not insult His Lordship!" she snarled, before bowing her head to Marth. "Did I do well, Lord Marth?"

"Yes, thank you," Marth stated with a smirk. "You are dismissed."

The blue-haired princess quickly exited the room, and Ike laughed. "Y'know, I really wish Priam could be a newcomer; I want a servant!"

"It's actually kind of annoying after a while," Marth huffed. "She won't leave me alone."

"Can I continue?" Lucas asked, annoyance in his voice. Everyone silenced, and the psychic cleared his throat. "What happens when Three falls in love with One, and what happens when the others find out? And then he put some emoticons."

"Palutena and Pit, then? Do they have a ship name?" Robin asked.

"Pirutena?" suggested Marth.

"I like Palit." Red interjected.

"But why us?" Palutena asked. "I mean, I'm friends with Pit, but why would Ness ship us? Why not Pit and Viridi; that's my OTP."

"Yeah, why not- WAIT, WHAT?" Pit exclaimed, red burning his cheeks. "Me and... Viridi? B-b-but..."

"Have you not forgotten that kiss?" Peach asked Palutena with a smirk.

"That was not canon!" the goddess seethed. "It wasn't even in the Japanese version!"

"So, how would we react if they were supposed to be enemies?" Red reiterated. "Well, I would tell Pit to get over it, because he apparently wants to be married to me."

"That's not what I said!" Pit cried. "I only said you'd be a better wife than Marth or Toon!" After an awkward silence, Pit blushed. "Uh, that didn't come out right."

Robin laughed. "I'd tell Palutena to go for it and meet him in secret and all that! Ooh," she added with a devious grin. "That would actually be a really great Fanfiction! Of course, it'd be PeachxPalutena, but-"

"Excuse me?" Peach screeched.

"What, you ship me with Sumia," Robin huffed.

Peach glared at the tactician sideways. "Touche."

A small ding from Lucas's phone heralded his next statement. "Ness says he is 'amused by your answers'," Lucas read. "He also says he set up a camera so everyone else could watch."

"How did he..." Marth questioned to himself.

"Great!" Peach exclaimed, interrupting. "Now everyone else can see how brilliant I am!"

"And how much everyone ships us," Roy added in a deadpan.

"So, next question! Everyone gangs up on Pit, does he stand a chance?" Peach read.

"Of course I do!" the angel proclaimed. "I mean, I can just fly out of there!

"Doesn't Palutena give you the power of flight?" Toon Link countered.

"Yeah, so?"

"She'd be against you as well," Marth pointed out.

Pit's face fell. "Uh, okay then, back-up plan. I know! How about... THIS!" He bowed his head, as if in prayer. "Viridi, please give me the power of flight and save from these psychos!"

Pit's wings began to glow with a green shine and lift him into the air rapidly, bursting a hole in the roof as he ascended. "I- I didn't actually mean that!" he screamed as he flew straight up into the black of the night.

Red snickered dryly. "Well, I guess we have our answer."

"Will he be back anytime soon?" Toon Link asked, staring through the hole in the ceiling.

"Not until Viridi's done yelling at him," Palutena answered with a smirk. "So he might be a while."

AN- Yay, more shipping! Just so you know, most of these couples are completely random, as in not necessarily ones I ship. Well, except IkexMarth and another couple that comes in later. Also, Palutena's comment about the kiss not being canon comes from the ending of the original Kid Icarus, where in the localized versions, an extra ending where Palutena kissed Pit was added. So, thanks for reading, and special thanks to Meeeee for the first question. -Twilight Joltik