Lost But Never Found

Chapter 7

I had 10 more minutes until the next class which is Art. My leg started to go up and down. I do that whenever I'm nervous or anxious. I forced my leg to stop and waited for the class to end so I could go to my next class. Asher is, fortunately, not in the rest of my classes, only the first one which I'm in right now. The bell rang and I jumped out of my seat and had everything in my arms ready to go. I always pack up early and no one ever stops me because I have already practically graduated. I walked out of class and walked to my next one which was only a hallway away. I tend to stay close to the lockers so I don't get pushed as much as I would if I was near the middle of the chaos. I got to the art class with only a few shoves here and there. Not as much as I got yesterday. I couldn't wait until the class started. This my favorite class, also the teacher is really nice. She has been my favorite teacher since I first got here which was 4 years ago since this is my last year. She smiled and waved to me.

I returned her gesture and sat in the seat that was closest to her desk. I keep my head down while I hear everyone walking inside the classroom. I jumped as someone kicked my desk as they continued walking down the aisle. I looked up and saw that Sadie was walking away from my desk and to her desk the was on the other side of the room, 3 rows away. "Today we will be sketching whatever comes to mind. You may listen to music when drawing, but you need headphones if you are listening to music." I plugged my headphones into my phone and started playing 'Let Me Down Slowly' by Alec Benjamin. This song would have to be my favorite song this year. My favorite song changes when I hear a song that I really like. It really depends on what I'm feeling. I grabbed all my drawing things from my bag and grabbed a piece of paper from my sketchbook.

If you couldn't already tell, I love drawing. My most favorite thing to draw when I'm alone is wildlife animals. I have loved nature since I was little. Not just the trees and the forest. But everything that's in the woods/forest. There's a forest behind the pack house that has a special area that only I know of. I found it one day when I was running into the woods after I was called some....explicit names. I ran into the forest and continued running until I got to a cliff that had a big rock to sit on and the area was filled with flowers of all different types. I was 10 at the time when I found it. I was sitting on the rock and looked up at the moon that was shining so bright in the dark night, at that moment was when I got Lupus. We talked and talked for the whole night, learning about each other. I decided from then on, that place would be my safe haven. From everyone and everything.

I have gone there ever since then. I always went there when everyone was asleep and that was around 11 or 12 at night. I stay there for a few hours every night, just thinking about my life and what it could have been. When Lupus growled in my head, I zoned back into reality. Zoning out was probably my best/worst quality. Meaning I can escape reality whenever I want, but I will have to go back to reality at one point.