Heuristic: There's No Us In Success

1

The turning point, the big eureka moment, had been as Finn's locker door slammed shut and he angrily accused her of
doing to him precisely what he was doing to her – ignoring her dreams. She had stopped the pleading "I can't do it without you' from escaping her lips as she suddenly realised that it just wasn't true. Given the current state of their relationship she couldn't do it with him. Sounds faded away and her vision blurred slightly as suddenly snippets of her Dads less than enthusiastic remarks about her 'delightfully naïve' and 'cutely Neanderthal' boyfriend combined with Quinn's assertion that she was destined for great things started to play loudly through her brain.

A spur of the moment suggestion of co-running a swimming pool business in Hollywood was meant to compete with her lifetime ambition of Broadway? Unbelievable. The scales had been lifted from her eyes – just how long had she been wandering about in a, probably excess after-shave induced, coma? Why was she suddenly exposed to the full extent of her errors when double calculus was beckoning? Never mind the infinitesimally small amount of change her maths teacher was always on about, she was going for a seismic shift to rival the size of an extinction event. When did she become a doormat? She had taken her eye off the ball – perhaps not the best metaphor for someone who was as sportingly challenged as she was - but now she was back on track and focussing on the important things in life. New York, Nyada, and Broadway – everything else could wait. Or more accurately, everyone else could go hang particularly one Finn Hudson.

Rachel's road to Damascus moment – Christian tales loomed large in her schooling if not her home life- was sufficient for her to veer into juvenile delinquent territory by deciding to skip her first ever lesson in the entirety of her school career so far. In fact it was a decision that would directly lead her into skipping the second ever lesson of her school career as the Spanish Inquisition that occurred if only turning up for the second of a double lesson was possibly worse than that for not attending both lessons at all.

Rachel stumbled into the darkened auditorium hoping for privacy and for some soundproofing when she finally let herself vent at what a doormat she had been for far too long. Her yell of anguish and exasperation reverberated in a satisfying fashion around the cavernous space. She drew in a deep breath and yelled again this time aiming to rattle anything that wasn't nailed down; papers sliding to the floor and an abandoned half full glass that she was sure shook were the best she could manage rather than shaking the very foundations of the building. Rachel was disappointed that her newfound rebelliousness wasn't sufficient to throw all her personal decorum standards out of the window so her intended bellow of a swear word actually came out as a half whispered barely audible even to herself "Fuck". She tugged Finn's ring off her finger and placed it on the top of the piano from where it mocked and taunted her. Such a small band of metal to hold her captive. Suddenly her spirits felt as if they were soaring, the shackles were off and finally she could breathe properly for the first time in ages. No more worrying about anyone else's thoughts and feelings, whether she was too loud, too annoying or too clever – she could just be.

Rachel seated herself at the piano and gazed around the stage in front of her. This was supposed to be the springboard to a successful bright and illustrious career in performance not the springboard to part ownership of one of a multitude of failing pool businesses. She was destined to be escorted to star studded events not following after Finn to ensure he didn't forget his lunch in between filming adverts for toothpaste, shampoo and probably ladies razors if she were to capitalise on her strengths. What has Finn been thinking - did thinking even come into it? There was that whole Sebastian photo shopped picture debacle which Finn managed to turn into her selfish fault when she wasn't prepared to stand down from the Glee club to spare his blushes. How did that Warblers plan to humiliate Finn suddenly become her fault? If roles were reversed would Finn have been keen to give up his quarterback position to protect her reputation? Fat chance, he'd probably be telling her the picture was flattering and that she needed to learn not to take herself so seriously.