inexpedient utterances

high

as my body lurches on,
i cannot feel, see, smell

the world around me

full of life, actions, things.

i know i am a part. i am involved in humanity,
as much as anyone else is

but i cannot seem,
to view my actions in my own mind
instead i watch,
myself perform them emotionlessly

until i speak to you
and i am brought back to reality
i live
i am me again.

or until i leave the water
until i breath again
the oxygen

my feet slip
on the edge of another well, a long tunnel
when i fall i don't land
not unless it's in love

i can't build my conversations,
i act with my feelings, i feel with my
actions

where does the circle end?
around and around, weaving through time and space, feeling as if earth lost its face