I'm sorry that I'm not sorry. (Varian x Reader)

~ Dix ~

ANOTHER LYRIC CHAPTER! I'm sorry I just love doing them and found a song I like for it. Enjoy! This chapter is gonna switch between Varian and your P.O.V during the song so don't get too confused.  

Your P.O.V

"Thanks, Cass," I say as she pats my back. 

She doesn't know I put Varian in a prison. 

Everyone but me thinks he's dead. 

Lady Caine? She was killed. I framed her for murdering Varian. I knew she wouldn't keep my secret. 

Do I miss him? I...

I don't know. 

It's quiet (uptown. FoRgIvEnEsS! CaN yOu ImAgInE!?) without him. And even after all of what he did years ago... I still love his smile and perky attitude.  

I still love him. 

Everything is just so confusing right now I don't really know what to think. 

"Anything you need, (Y/N)," she says and walks out of my bedroom. 

I smile but once the door is closed it quickly fades. 

'Did I make the right decision? I mean I got my revenge, but... this doesn't feel right.' 

I walk over to the balcony. 

We would spend hours on this baloney together. Talking, singing, laughing. 

I hear our daughter start to cry. I rush to go get her. 

She has Varian's bright blue eyes and my (H/C) hair. 

She is the best thing that's ever happened to me. 

Varian would love her to pieces. 

I could see his explaining periodic table elements and showing her little explosions of color from a beaker. I could see him sing her to sleep every night and cuddle her in his throne in the middle of a meeting. 

I smile and start to tear up. 

I pick up our daughter and bring her over to the balcony with me. 

"Oh darling, calm down. It's okay. Mommy's here. Shh..." I cradle her in my arms. She starts to calm down. The sun is setting. The sky is full of colors like pink, yellow, orange and even some purple. It's beautiful. Our daughter keeps crying. I start to sing to calm her down... 

(Bold is you, Bold slanted in Varian, Both is bold slanted and underlined. Enjoy!)

"Liiiiiiiiiiiiight."

"You wake me, you take me, remake me more than anyone."

Varian's P.O.V (in his cell. Might wanna pause the song for a minute.) 

"It's gonna be okay, Varian. I promise." Raps tell me. I smile. 

They leave and I put my head down. 

"I'll show you. I know you. I owe you more than anyone."  

Your P.O.V. 

I look down at my daughter. 

"You rescue me from all my tears. I'd gladly give you all my years." 

I think back to Varian. 

"I'll pay any price for finding you-

Varian's P.O.V

"-And spend the rest reminding you." 

Your P.O.V

"My restless life is worth so much more." 

Varian's P.O.V

"Because of you worth living for."

Third person P.O.V

"If I find you maybe love me too. I'd only love you more." 

They both broke down, crying. 

Varian's P.O.V

I could easily feel her touch. It felt so nice and comforting. 

"I'm here now, it's clear now,  your near now. Please don't run away. I feel you so will you reveal you don't wanna run away."

Your P.O.V

I looked down at our daughter. She looked just like him. Her blanket said 'Mommy and Daddy love you - (Y/N) and Varian.' I laughed. We made this blanket for her when we found out we were expecting. 

"I'll read your name and see your face. A kiss away from your embrace. I'll pay any price for finding you and spend what's left reminding you." 

Varian's P.O.V. 

"My restless life is worth so much more because of you worth living for. If I find you maybe love me too."

Third person P.O.V. 

"I'll only love you more!" 

Your P.O.V

"My golden temple by the sea you are my Kamakura tree." 

Third person P.O.V

"I'll pay any price for finding you and spend what's left reminding you. My restless life is worth so much more because of you worth so much more."

"If I find you-" 

"-maybe love me too."

"I'll only love you more." 

Your P.O.V

I look down and see my daughter fast asleep. I smile. 

"I'm here now, It's clear now, your near now..." 

I put her back in her crib and climb into my bed. 

'Maybe it will all be better...' 

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\

Sorry it was confusing. 

This book is getting really depressing. 

XD

I need a name for the daughter! 

My top two I found are Evelyn and Orla. 

There just unique. I like them. 

Tell me what you think or some name recommendations. 

BYE!

-Uhh