You Saved Me From Myself ~YoonMinSeok~

Author's Note - The End

Hi...long time so see...

It's been a while since I've written something on here...

Since I last posted...a lot has happened.

I'm so sorry for leaving those of you who enjoyed this book on hold for so long. I don't know how to say this but I might as well just get it out...

I will not be finishing this book.

Life really had its ups and downs over the past couple of months...and I still feel guilty for not writing the next chapter or even trying to finish the book.

If it wasn't obvious before, I used this book as an outlet for the dark place I had been in when I first created this account.

A lot of the angst and sad feelings shared in this book, though not directly related to experiences I have had, were written as a way for me to express emotions I couldn't share with those around me.

I guess you could say this account was my alter ego or true self? On my profile page, I have a reading list of books from my original/'main' account which is a lot more cheery and innocent. That is the account that all of my friends follow, not knowing I had this one. My account, AKindSmarty21 is kind of a joke for my friends and I since they know me to be the most inactive person on Wattpad out of all of us. I would open that account every few months and see hundreds of notifications that I never bothered to look at because I really didn't find a need to use that account. My friends didn't know I made this new account and did not know that I had been quite active on Wattpad through this account. 

I wrote this book to express feelings I never thought I'd ever share with those around me. We all have our own lives to deal with so I thought it would be better if I wrote this story instead of bothering the people I love with my own problems.

Well, it wasn't until recently that I realized why I really started to write this book. With every chapter I wrote, I was in some sort of messed up mindset and it just wasn't fun. Those nights when I would write a new chapter, I was in a dark place and didn't really know what to do with life. This book is a YoonMinSeok fanfic because Jimin and Hoseok are supposed to represent two of my best friends.

Looking back on it now, writing each new chapter was a reminder to myself of no matter how bad things got, I always had my Jimin and Hoseok who I could turn to. Though I had never admitted to anything, similarly to how in this story Yoongi had never explained anything to the other members, it was just the presence of my friends or knowing that they were there for me that helped me to feel better.

After the last chapter I posted, life was still crazy and chaotic, but it seemed to help support a better mental state for me. I'm definitely not saying that I'm completely better or 'recovered' because trust me, there are still times where I find myself in that dark place again. But instead, I don't think I was in a place where I felt the need to write again. I started to become a little more open with my emotions, and though it often came out as jokes or some relatable remark that didn't need to be taken seriously, it felt good to just put those feelings out here. I didn't need anyone to really look deep into it, the light-hearted laughter was more than enough.

To be completely honest, this past couple of weeks had been crazy busy again and super stressful. (cus ya know, finals and stuff T-T) I can function under lots of stress but it does absolutely no favors for my mental health. I found myself in a really dark place again and planning to come back here and write again.

My friends and I were talking and things were happening and being discussed that brought back emotions that I hadn't felt in a while. Emotions that pushed me to start writing. In an emotional blur, I sent my Jimin a message which Jimin read and quickly caught onto my bs. In the message, I kind of confessed the pretty trash mental state I had, but that wasn't the point of the message so I thought it would just get blown over and not be a big deal or anything. But I should know my Jimin better. Jimin wouldn't let it go unnoticed.

My Hoseok was soon told everything too. So after many tears and confessions later, here I am. Writing this chapter. Writing to tell you all that I will not be finishing this book. I have no reason to. My Jimin and Hoseok know this book exists now, as well as all the emotions and reasons behind it. I don't know if they have read it yet or will, but I want to thank them for everything they have done for me and the never-ending support.

It's their love and the love from everyone else in my life (the rest of the BTS members I guess) that has helped me. They haven't given me any reasons to continue writing, and have been absolute lifesavers.

I'm sorry if you're a reader just looking for a normal angst BTS Wattpad story but I really can't finish this story. I never thought this book would receive all the attention it has thus far and I thank you all so much for supporting my trash writing. 

I will post one final chapter with the content I never got around to posting. It will include the final conflict chapter, as well as the outline that would've been the base for chapters preceding and proceeding the final conflict.

Thank you so much for all of the support and for taking the time to read this author's note. 

    ~ X_YamiKawaii_X