Til You Come Back to Me Again - A Love Story

Chap- 16

 

Sixteen

Bittersweet Merger

Three weeks later

She was beautiful in her white gown. The silk, lace and tulle were accented by winking crystals on embroidered roses and flowed over her petite figure. Her hair was piled high on her head, held in place with a crystal-beaded comb, and a few curly locks framed her face. She wore no veil, therefore, there was nothing obstructing my view of her beautiful features. She looked like a princess. She was a princess to me. My tuxedo consisted of black slacks and a white jacket with a red bow tie and vest. Katia picked it out and I was happy to let her. Truthfully, I couldn't care less what I wore, all I could think about was she was really going to be mine.

Of all the defining moments in my life, the one that would forever stand out as the third most prominent, was the moment Katia softly spoke four words.

Stage four ovarian cancer.

Those four words changed everything.

She had already been through the tests, and when she got home, she went through another round the next day. The doctor said it was rare for a woman her age to have ovarian cancer, and because it had been growing in her body for so long, it was out of control. The cancer had spread from her ovaries to her liver and lymph nodes in her breasts.

We digested the prognosis. Then we had a choice to make: Katia could have surgery and treatments, granting her an extra month at the most, or enjoy the quality of life she had while she could. My sweet, brave Katia made her choice, accepting the fact that either way, the cancer would end her life. So, she chose to live her life and enjoy all the time she had left with me. She would take supplements and continue to exercise for as long as she could, and when the pain worsened, she would manage it with medication. Neither she nor I could think past that.

That evening I told her I needed to be alone and she let me. I went for a drive out to Coco Beach. I parked in an area that was not as populated and got out. Taking off my shoes, I walked the beach for an hour, trying to calm the anger that was eating my insides. I kept asking why. Why would God take her from me when we had only just discovered our love?

I finally sat down on the beach and dried my face as I gazed out at the ocean and watched the waves roll inland to lap the shore before receding and repeating the process. After calming my thoughts, I apologized to God for my anger. I had no right to be angry. Because she was His before she was mine.

That night, we lay in my bed, holding one another and crying for the shortened life we would have together as man and wife. Katia couldn't stand the thought of leaving me alone and it literally cut me up inside to think of losing her. I had only just realized my true feelings for her and now I would have to face losing her. We cried for the children we'd secretly dreamed of, children that would never be ours. I never knew I could hurt so much.

It was during this bout of pain that I finally kissed her for the first time. The kiss was sweet and pure, as a first kiss should be. But soon, emotion, both raw and desperate, seeped into the kiss, and heat rolled through me as the scent and taste of her filled my senses. I reminded myself that this was all new to her, and in a sense, it was new for me as well. Because the passion that the feel of her mouth against mine invoked was a level I had never reached before. I had never even been close. Having her in my arms was heaven. Exercising every bit of self-control I could muster, I parted my mouth from hers and just held her against my heart. Then we fell asleep.

The following day, we dried our tears and drew courage to the surface, determined to face everything head-on and enjoy the time we had together, which meant marrying as soon as possible. With Sylvia and Kate's help, we pulled the wedding together quickly.