The Problems With Being Gay At 13

Ch.7 -Kisses From Demetrius-

October 2, 2012

Yesterday, dinner was a disaster. It felt like the Henderson’s knew something I didn’t Mr. Daniel and Mr. Alexander kept on looking at me uncertain about something. Even Marisol kept looking at me. Demetrius was being his mute self and not talking. Ariel kept smirking at me. I found out later that night  what they were all looking at me for. Mom left and Demetrius was in the bathroom so only Ariel, Marisol, Mr. Alexander, and Mr. Daniel were left in the living room. They all stared at me and when I finally asked what Marisol answered.

“Tyler, you’re gay. But we’re trying to figure out if it was true or not. Ariel told us about you kissing Demetrius, the shock on your face when she kissed you, and how you look at Demetrius. Now that we’re completely in the loop we see it now.”

I blushed which they assumed was a yes. They kept on questioning me about thing like did I come out yet, when did I kiss Demetrius, and a lot of different shit. Thankfully the only person Ariel didn’t tell was Demetrius.

“Metrius has an excellent gaydar but I don’t understand why he doesn’t see it in you.” Mr. Alexander said.

Then Demetrius entered the room. There was an uncomfortable silence so I just got up and left. The reason why I didn’t write yesterday about this is because I couldn’t think straight.

Another night of loss of sleep thanks to the Henderson family. It really made me think. Who else knows I’m gay? Do my “friends” know I’m gay? Does Mom know I’m gay? So this morning I felt like a zombie again, ugly clothes, no morning shower, unkempt hair, morning breath, and no breakfast. Demetrius said something but I ignored his beautiful voice. HE even offered me a marshmallow (which he never does) but I refused. I just couldn’t deal with it. Throughout the day I had this weird urge to talk to Demetrius about me being gay but I fought it. When we got home they welcomed themselves into my house and some of my food. Ariel looked through my refrigerator and closed it with disgust.

“YO, Tyler!! Do you know how to cook?”

“No.”

Of course I did. But did I feel like making food? No so Ariel just pouted in a corner while she did that Demetrius pulled me to the side and started questioning me out of nowhere.

“Tyler, what’s up with you lately? You haven’t been your normal, uptight self?”

I rubbed my eyes. “Nothing’s wrong.”

“Is it about Ariel?”

“What about her?”

“She told me she kissed you. If that’s the problem then just know that once you get to know her she’s not that bad to be around.”

I nodded and he ruffled my hair.

I couldn’t believe that Demetrius was completely oblivious to the fact that everyone in the Henderson home knew I was gay even though I said nothing to lead them to that conclusion. It was very unbelievable. Then out of nowhere I kissed him L I feel ashamed of myself. I kissed my only true friend and now he was enjoying it. So was I. He took control by putting his tongue in my mouth as he did that there was an aching in my jeans. Not just any aching. Sad to admit this was my first boner. Thankfully I wore the extra skinny jeans today. I let out a moan but when I realized what the fuck I was doing I pulled back. His face was blank and expressionless as usual. I ran upstairs and locked myself in my room before he could get a word out. You know if somebody found this one day and looked inside they would slap me because of my dirty thoughts and actions. Lord, I need to repent. But not now because I’m worrying about me and Demetrius’ future as friends. But there is none because I suck ass by kissing him. It was only a matter of time.

Words cannot describe how the inside of Demetrius’ mouth tastes like. It was like magic, his tongue was so warm and inviting. The only other tongue I’ve tasted was Ariel’s and that was the least bit inviting. But it was warm and tasted good.

Oh god, am I really bisexual? And why am I comparing Demetrius and Ariel’s tongues?

Do I need help?

Am I going crazy?

I need to sleep…

At least the banging on the door stopped

I wonder what Ariel and Demetrius are doing?

Are they talking about me?

Are they talking about how much I suck ass?

Jesus, please help me.

I want some juice.

Maybe when they leave I’ll get some apple juice.

I wonder if I can sneak out and get a juice box

Sounds good

Not as good as the taste of Demetrius’ mouth.

Where’s the bible when you need one?

And what am I going to do with this huge bulge in my pants?