I Don't Want to Remember

Never again

Camila enjoyed the day with the girls. Same with Lauren, the girls didn't answer some of her questions about her past. Other than knowing that she's in the popular crowd of their school, Dinah and the rest didn't shared much.

"Hey.. you've been quiet.." Lauren asked Camila as they walk back to get home.

"Uhh.. just thinking.." Camila smiled at Lauren.

"Thinking about what?" Lauren shyly asked.

Camila was never quiet whenever they're together. The quietness of Camila sparked Lauren's curiosity. Especially for someone who's an over thinker, Lauren was left bothered as Camila walk back silently with her. The brown eyed girl would always find a way to start conversation towards Lauren. So when Camila didn't try to start a conversation as they walk back home, Lauren did.

"You.. I guess.." Camila answered as she stop and look at Lauren.

"Me?.. why me?" Lauren abruptly stop from walking and also look at Camila. The green eyed girl averted her eyes from Camila as she feel her heart beat rapidly. Camila took Lauren's hand from her chest and sooth it with her own.

"Hey.. don't over think.. Laur.. I don't want to see you being uncomfortable with me. I'm just thinking about who I really am back then. Especially to you or the girls. All of you have been very kind and understanding. But the way Normani acted towards me.. says something else like I'm the bad guy.."

"I told you you were just different.." Lauren whispered back.

"How different Laur? I wanted to know.. please.." Camila pleaded, as she continuedly sooth Lauren's trembling hand on her own.

"Let's just say.. I'm just too afraid you.." Lauren swallowed hard as she tried not to tear up again in front of Camila.

"Afraid?" Lauren didn't answer and just look at Camila's hand in hers.

"Do I make you uncomfortable now? Do you want me to stop asking?" Camila asked worriedly.

"I just.. I really don't want to look back Camz.. you're different now.. and this.. you.. you being like this to me.. is just.. I just.. I don't know.. now, when I'm with you.. I feel like no one can hurt me.." Lauren answered genuinely with trembling lips. Camila felt like Lauren will breakdown in any minute so she took both of Lauren's hand and slide it off to her waist down  to her back. She enveloped the girl in a warm tight hug. That's when Lauren cried again in the crook of Camila's neck. Still with a firm embrace Camila soothed Lauren's back with both of her hands.

"I hate myself for hurting you.. Laur.. I may not know how or why I did it.. but that will never happen again.. okay? Never." Camila whispered as she feel her eyes to water. It pains her to see Lauren so vulnerable. Lauren nodded as she calm herself from crying. Lauren tighten her grip and move her face on Camila's shoulder.

Camila move her head to look at Lauren but Lauren dip her head on Camila's shirt.

"Don't look.. I'm a mess.." Lauren murmured on Camila's shoulder.

"A beautiful mess.." Camila tighten her hold to Lauren and kiss the top of Lauren's head. She let her lips linger on it as she waited for Lauren's crying to stop. They stayed in that position for another ten minutes when Lauren let go of Camila.

"Thank you.. sorry for crying too much" Lauren sniffed and wiped her eyes. Camila smiled and help Lauren to wipe her tears away. Camila took Lauren's hands and situated it firmly on her waist.

"I'm the cause of this.. let me dry it up.." Camila gently wiped Lauren's cheek with her hands. Both girls were aware with how close the position they're in. That just a few more centimetres their lips would touch. With both eyes still lock on each other's, Lauren decided to close her eyes. As much as Camila wanted to close the gap, she decided to kiss Lauren's forehead instead still caressing the green eyed girls cheek. On the other hand, Lauren thought she'll finally get her first kiss when she felt Camila's warm lips on her forehead. But this didn't stop the rapid beating of her heart.

"Let's get you home Laur.." Camila placed one more kiss on Lauren's forehead before letting go. Lauren cleared her throat and nodded shyly.

"Hey.. I wanted to get that kiss when I really deserved it okay? Not because your sad or crying.." Camila took Lauren's hand in hers as she motioned Lauren to resume walking.
With that Lauren was left in a blushing mess again.

"Hey wait.." Camila stop once again and look at Lauren's blushing face.

"You wanted to kiss me too right? Or this is just one sided?" Camila asked worriedly.

Still blushing profusely Lauren just silently nodded.

"Good." Camila smiled as she kissed Lauren's hand in hers.

Lauren then rested her head on Camila's shoulder as they walk together hand in hand.

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A/N
Let the ship sail! 🚢
Happy Pride Month! 😘