✰ 0.1 ✰

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i feel like shit right now.

i'm sitting on the rooftop of an unfamiliar building, with my legs curled up to my body and my hands on the floor for support. i guess i should call this unfamiliar building my home now. it's so high. how many stories? must be at least thirty. the place is huge, with tons of residents and new ones moving in each day. also, there's four highschools nearby. this city is very big compared to what i'm used to. it's the highest building compared to the surroundings. i have to admit though, the view is nice.

the stars shimmer in the sky, and the moonlight hits my face. i can see all the lights of the city, too. maybe this will be one good thing about this strange place.

i'm crying. i never cry. i don't want anybody to see me this vulnerable. i'm strong, not weak.

i spoke too soon. i hear footsteps from behind me coming from the staircase that led up here. shit. not now!!!

"hey, what are you doing up here?" the voice snaps at me aggressively. it's the voice of a boy. "this is my spot." he says.

i let out a sniffle as more tears fall from my eyes. i really don't wanna deal with this shit right now.

"oh," the voice says, in a soft tone this time. "i'm sorry. i didn't realize." his footsteps get louder, which means he must be coming closer to me. my back is still to him, and he hasn't seen my face yet.

"stop," i say in a quiet voice. his footsteps stop.

"i was just gonna sit next to you," he says.

"please don't. i dont't want anyone to see me right now," i say through sobs.

i don't hear anything for a few moments, and i'm thinking that maybe he silently left the rooftop. thank god he didn't see me like this. i feel relieved.

that's until i feel something against my back, and hear someone's breathing. it feels like... is he sitting back to back with me?

"what are you doing?" i whisper as i sniffle.

"you said you didn't want anyone to see you, and i can't see you right now." he is sitting back to back with me. "i just want to give you some company," he says.

i continue crying. "why would you want to accompany a sad girl?" i say.

"so i can make her happy." he says. "so why are you crying?"

"why should i tell you?" i spit back.

"it's not like you know who i am, or i know who you are. it's anonymous, if you get what i'm trying to say." he says. "also, it just seems like you need someone to talk to."

both of his points are true. i do need someone to talk to, vent to, and share my emotions with. it's also true that since we don't know each other at all, not even each other's names, that it will be anonymous and won't matter very much at all.

"well, okay. i can tell you. but promise that we keep anonymous? that means we will never reveal each othes' identities to each other. like never. no names, age, school, etc." i say firmly.

"i promise." he says.

for a brief moment, our hands touch. i think that he's going to pull away, but he doesn't, so i don't either.

so we sit, back to back, in the dark, our hands touching ever so slightly, with the stars of seoul glitter above us.

———

a/n ; if yall like my story (which you probably don't cuz it's  t r a s h) then please vote 🥺🥺 it means a lot to me. also thank you for reading 🤧🤧
okay but i will never be over the fact the jinhyuk and minkyu didn't get to debut. i'm still thinking about it like whaaaaaa how 🤯🤯

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