Chapter 4

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Darry

I'm already awake when the first light peers through my window. Laying in my bed, staring at the ceiling, her face flashing through my thoughts. This has sort of become my thing this year; unable to sleep, thinking of Alice. Her eyes, her lips. The way her eyes light up when she laughs. We've been best friends our whole lives. I have never known a moment without her. I've loved her since we were little kids, playing in the field behind her house, or splashing around in the little creek that runs through the trees in between our family's properties. But this year, something has changed. I can't stand the thought of not being with her, like together together. I want to tell her that I love her, that I need her to say she loves me back, and not just because we're "Darry & Alice", best friends. But because she sees me the same way I have seen her since we started school.

I knew I loved Alice when I was five years old. We had seen each other every day since birth, our moms are lifelong best friends too. So much so, that they got pregnant at the same time with their first kids and vowed that we'd be raised together. And they have held to that; our families have date nights together and even spend every major holiday together. On that first day of school, Cathy brought Alice over to our house so we could all go into school together.

Alice was nervous about school. It's all she had talked about to me the summer before we started Kindergarten. She was genuinely scared. But I was excited. Happy to be getting away from the farm for a little bit, anxious for new scenery, new adventures... with Alice, of course. So, when Cathy stepped up to our door and opened the screen, we could barely see Alice peeking from around her mom's leg.

When she saw me, she lit up and came running to me, throwing her arms around my neck. "Darry!" she squealed as if we hadn't just seen each other the day before. "I'm scared, Darry. What if they don't like me? What if they're mean to me?", she asked me with a shaky voice, still clutching to my arm, as if I could somehow make everything OK for her. "They're gonna love you, Alice", I tell her. It was in that moment right there, her holding tightly to my arm, looking up at me, her sad, questioning eyes looking up into mine, I got butterflies in my stomach and my head went all swimmy. I knew right then, I would do anything to make her happy, and to make her feel safe, for the rest of our lives.

I look out my window and see Alice coming out of her window. I can see the top of her house over the trees that run between our houses. She does this a lot lately; sitting on her roof in the mornings.

The sun isn't even fully up yet, I think to myself. What is she thinking about up there? I hope it's not a somebody that has her climbing out of her window, talking to the sun. I feel a pang in the pit of my stomach at the thought. I wouldn't be able to handle it if Alice had interest in another guy.

I get up and walk across the floor to look out at her sitting there on her roof. The sun hits her hair and it looks like a halo around her head. She really does look like an angel. Alice is the most beautiful girl I've ever seen. There's not a single girl at our school that could hold a candle to her. Her green eyes alone make my knees weak. And I would give anything to kiss her, to feel her full, pouty lips against mine. I sigh at the thought and turn to look for my clothes for the day.

It's the last day of school. That means tonight's the night for the 'Summer Nights' Bonfire. We have one every year here in Cedar Ridge to make the end of a school year and the beginning of summer break. It's something they do for the high school kids. Anyone currently attending or entering high school can come and hang out around the fire. It's there that I'm thinking about telling her. But first, I have to show her what I've been working on all year. What's been keeping me from being with her as much as I normally would be... My car.

I've been working on this thing forever it feels like. And it's been so hard keeping it from her. Watching her eyes question me every time I had to leave her early, or when I told her I couldn't come over that day. My heartbreaking every time I had to disappoint her again. But this is for us, I kept telling myself. She will be happy when we have our own way to get around. When we have freedom. I hope she loves it as much as I do.

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