(35 part 2 ! )
i'm sorry I didn't post yesterday.
I was busy getting stuff ready for school that starts tomorrow:((
I'm excited, but not.
8/14/19
word count: 729 words
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it has been two months since finn and i's break-up, and it's been hectic.
I miss him a lot and now that I'm in a relationship with jack, it's even worse.
don't get me wrong, I love jack, but he's my friend.
I know jack is enjoying himself because he's always liked me.
but, I like finn.
I don't like jack like that.
but it's whatever our managers want us to do.
I guess this is okay.
now I sit on jacks lap at a premiere party(if that's a thing idk just go wit it), paparazzi getting what they wanted.
jack is a great person, but I don't want to give into the act intentionally.
I don't want finn to think that I really appreciate my relationship.
but I know that it's too late for that.
finn is a relationship now.
millie is happy about it, but is finn really wanting it?
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after the party, we both went back to his house.
he fell asleep, cuddling me.
I let him do it because I don't want to be rude.
I love jack and don't want him to be upset.
besides, who's watching?
I decided to text finn.
it took a lot of courage, but I couldn't keep pretending that I didn't have feelings for him.
I know this isn't right and I shouldn't say now that you are in a relationship with someone else, but I need you. I love you so much and I can't handle being apart from you. the truth is that I don't want to be with jack, I want to be with you.
I faced my phone down while shutting it off, and laying it on the bed jack and I shared.
I took a deep breathe and slowly fell asleep.
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I slowly opened my eyes to see y/n still asleep next to me.
I laid my arm back around her waist and tried to go to sleep.
my eyes shot open from the vibration coming from y/n's phone that sat across from her sleeping body.
me, being curious, picked her phone up from he bed and turned it around to see what the notification came from.
I saw that it was finn texting her.
why the hell is finn texting her?!
I opened her phone since I have my fingerprint on her phone, and read it.
I know that I probably shouldn't, but why was she texting finn?
I know this isn't right and I shouldn't say now that you are in a relationship with someone else, but I need you. I love you so much and I can't handle being apart from you. the truth is that I don't want to be with jack, I want to be with you.
y/n, you don't know what you're saying. you're with jack for a reason: because you like him. not me. what would jack think of this? he loves you. like you said, "maybe it's for the better." so let it be that. you know we can't get back together. I'm with millie, now. and you're with jack, now. no matter how much we love one another, we can't get back together. I would, if I could, but I can't. so don't focus on me, focus on jack. move on. you two have a beautiful relationship, so don't ruin it like our managers ruined our's.
I was angry but sad at the same time.
I don't want to like y/n, but I do.
I know our managers are going to split us up one day, but I don't want that to happen.
what did finn mean by managers?
was their relationship staged too?
just like our's?
maybe they made the same mistake I made with y/n: falling in love with one another.
finn stole y/n's heart and I know she'll never love me back.
maybe I should just let them get back together.
but maybe finn doesn't want that.
like he said: him and millie are in a relationship.
I shook my thoughts and put y/n's phone back down and tried to go to sleep.
I turned my back towards her, giving her space.
