Life's A Song

I'll Never Love Again- Lady Gaga & Bradley Cooper

Dianne's PoV:
This was it, my life now. One simple decision had changed my life forever, whether it was for better or for worse I was unsure of yet. Strictly 2018 was over and I had moved back to Australia without a second thought when my brother has given me that phone call, leaving behind everyone I had become so close to in order to be with my parents, however one person in particular was stuck to my mind like glue. Joe. Joesph Sugg. The man I had been partnered with for this fateful series, the man I had fallen in love with without even realising, he made it so easy to do so and I never said goodbye, why I didn't is beyond me but it's too late to change that now. We had spent every day together for the past four months and I hadn't realised how much he meant to me until I was about 9,045 miles away from him over land and sea, unable to feel his touch, sense his smile or hear his laugh. He had no idea I had moved so far away but I knew it was only a matter of time before he called and found out, I know he'll find the truth eventually so there's no point lying, I could never do so to him anyway.

As the darkness began to fall and shadows cast by the street lights danced on my wall, taunting me under the moonlit sky I began to think properly for the first time in a while, tears formed in my eyes as I curled up in bed, finally allowing the thoughts trapped to run wild and free in circles round my head. Everything came crashing down on me at once as I saw a text from him flash on my screen and I realised just how much of a mistake I had made. I had never regret anything more in my life, what had I done? It was a simple message but it tore my heart to pieces, it read
"Hey Di, Amy told me you have moved to Australia, why didn't you tell me and say goodbye? I hope you enjoy life out there, I'll miss you so much, please don't lose touch x"
I couldn't even bring myself to reply as realisation hit me. I loved him and I'm sure he loved me, even if it was never an exchange we made officially. I was certain I would never be able to love again, no man had ever made me feel the way Joe did, I had never laughed, smiled, trusted as much as I did with Joe. No guy had ever made me feel so comfortable in his presence yet so unbelievably special. I never wanted to have that feeling with another person- I wasn't sure it was even possible. I had given my heart to a man who was almost a stranger at the time, it was worth every moment and I never wanted to do it again, it was a moment so special for Joe and I only. I don't want another man to say my name in the way Joe did and I know I'll never be able to say his name without tainted memories of all our times together. I never wanted to know another mans kiss, I just wanted it to be Joe's forever- yet I was the one who had left him on the other side of the world without even a mention of goodbye. As the sunlight dimmed I knew I would never see it in the same way again, a constant darkness had been cast around my life, a numbness of sorrow seeping through my veins and the depths of my soul. I thought back to the day we first got to know each other.

It was a simple September morning when joe came running into the studio, we knew we had been partnered but not much else about each other. Never in that moment the lanky blonde guy with two left feet came bounding into the studio like an excitable puppy and hugged me awkwardly did I think I would fall for him, never did it occur to me I would spend many evenings after crazily long hours of training back in his apartment, laughing over footage of us training filmed for his YouTube channel and then curled up together on the sofa or in his bed, cheekily exchanging kisses of all types full of every emotion imaginable, never did I think I would be so content in his arms; yet now I'm wishing I was able to feel that again, denying that he was gone because I was stuck to him, unable to move on despite the distance and me needing to do so. But it wasn't any touch I longed for, it was his specifically. No other man could fill that perfectly Joesph sized hole I was certain, he was the only one that could ever make me feel so light and free, like I was capable of anything.

Taking a deep breath, I decided to call him, to explain why I had come home to look after my sick parents, to tell him I loved him and no other guy could ever fill the hole left in my heart, that I don't regret a single moment spent together because thinking back to every moment fills me with happiness despite the solemn situation, but what I do regret is never saying goodbye because- without him- I'll never love again. If he loved me too he would understand, right?

A/N: hey! I decided to do this whole one from Dianne's PoV as I didn't think it made sense to keep jumping from the two, if you want me to do basically the same one from Joe's PoV let me know- I'm not sure if it'll be too repetitive though...

Thanks for the continuous love and support, please feel free to suggest any songs you want a chapter written from!
Loads of love, R xxx