Spirited Away: The Wait [ORIGINAL]

Loss

     “Haku, can I ask you something?”

     “Anything.”

     “Where do people go when they die?”

     There was a short pause. “Why do you ask, love?”

     “I was just thinking. Does a Heaven really exist?”

     “Heaven? What is that?”

     “I heard it’s a wonderful place. There’s no pain, no sadness, no sickness there. Everyone in Heaven is young and happy.”

     “I have never heard of such a place, but it does sound quite pleasant.”

     “The children at the hospital always tell me I’ll go there after I die.”

     “Do you think you’ll be going there?”

     “I don’t know, actually. It sounds like a fairy tale, but I think it’s better than thinking that I’ll only see endless darkness when I die.”

     “I wonder if spirits go there too.”

     “Maybe. I hope so. I wouldn’t want to go there and not see you, I want to stay with you forever.”

     He smiled, pressing his lips to her forehead. “Forever it is, then. It’s a promise.”

     Scream after scream tore through the fragile woman’s lips, blood coming out in spurts where whips lashed at her bare back. Her clothes had long torn through at the back. Whip after whip made contact with her soft skin, making her cry out in agony. Still she bit down hard on her lip, trying hard not to cry or to make any more sounds. She was aware of the man, her dragon, her lover watching her suffer, watching her being tortured, with even more torment and pain in his eyes.

     She could vaguely hear his screams amidst the loud cracks of the whips, her own wheezing and cries, and her erratic heartbeat. Through half-lidded eyes, she could see him thrashing wildly from where he was being chained, vainly attempting to break free and reach her. He was begging her with his eyes to just say a simple word.

     No.

     Things would have been much easier if she would just say that. The pain would stop. She would live a bit longer with her mother and the children at the hospital. She would die a more peaceful death on a bed in the hospital.

     No.

     That was effectively what she’d spat in his face when she turned him down. After all that effort into planning, into preparing for that beautiful, most romantic and most thoughtful thing she could ever imagine, she said that one word.

     No.

     Perhaps this was her way of making it up to him. Maybe this would leave a heavy scar over his heart, but she knew he would get over it in his own time. Time is the best healer; it just needed time to work.

     Sorry.

     She didn’t want to leave him. She wanted to stay by his side for an eternity, but perhaps this would have to do. At least he was by her side till the very end. But her heart was breaking—no, shattering into millions of shards that struck her with even more pain. She’d imagined, when her time came, that he would be by her side, holding her hand, and sending her off with that smile. That smile that she had grown to love, that smile that had in turn, taught her to smile.