Number 5

Its not worth it

I feel numb inside but yet I feel so much pain. Everything's so pointless and stupid.

?-Hey Y/n!

My friend Aidan says while walking next to me. Walking down the crowded halls, tinted with this ugly yellow color and lockers surrounding me.

Y-Hey

I say emotionless. He looks at me confused because I'm usually so happy and energetic, I'd wave and playfully annoy some of my friends but I just feel empty today. I thought it'd be gone so I just pretended like everything is fine but I can't pretend anymore, I feel like I'm falling apart.

A-You alright?
Y-Yeah. I'm just tired.

I say continuing to walk.

A-Oh look there's Carson....

Carson is someone who I waved to everyday, I annoy him a lot but he lowkey loves it.

Y-Oh...,okay

I say walking past Carson, he looked at me weird knowing I didn't wave or yell 'HEY CARSONNNNNM' or 'BEST BEST FRIEND'

I walked to my class and I sit down in my seat with Aidan sitting next to me. Aidan is my best friend. Someone who's been there for my highs and lows.

A-Why didn't you wave at Carson?
Y-What's the point? He's just gonna think I'm more annoying than I already am

To be honest I don't even know where that came from. I just feel so down and hurt

A-Just for some laughs.

I then shrug and then start writing down notes.

A-Are you gonna steal his pencil today?
Y-Probably not
A-What? But you always do it
Y-And? I'm probably just gonna end up giving it back and him getting even more annoyed with me.

I sigh and rub my eyes

A-Y/n seriously what's up?
Y-Nothing like I said I'm just tired.
A-It's more than that just tell me
Y-Aidan! I'm fine seriously. Just let it go

I say roughly as he sighs. People were staring....

A-Okay.... sorry

......

The day went by slowly, Aidan avoided me not wanting me to blow up in his face again and I totally get it
I mean I wouldn't wanna hang out with me either.

Carson-Hey....y/n
Y-Hey Carson

I said while going to open my locker since it was my lunch hour. Carson's locker was right next to mine and he started opening his...,. Forgot we had the same lunch.

Carson-So....how was your day?

Carson has brown fluffy hair with green emerald eyes. [A/n Lol I really don't feel describing him so here's a picture]

Y-Its school Carson.... nothing good happens
Carson-Well.... good things happen. I met you!
Y-Carson if Aidan put you up to this.... here 5 bucks just stop

I say handing him five bucks

Carson-Its sad that you think someone put me up for caring for one of my friends....
Y-Well? You hate me. You say I'm annoying everyday and you always ignore me. What else was I to expect?

I blew up. I looked up at him because he was taller than me but he looked down in embarrassment

Y-I'm sorry..... I knew it was all a joke. Carson....

He then embraced me in a hug.

Carson-We are friends.
Y-Okay.

He then releases me as I fast walk to the lunch room thinking that was weird.

......

I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
I cant take this anymore
All I've done today was yell

A-Is it really worth it? To take your life because you feel numb inside? To leave everybody behind?

Aidan says sitting next to me on my bed. Traumatized

A-It's not worth y/n. You can't leave me

I sigh and look down at the wounded cuts on my arm. Sitting in the dark as he pulls me in. My feet hang off my bed as I sit on the edge.

Y-Why not? There's nothing for me here anyways.
A-..... y/n.... I am in love with you

It took a while to sink in, how he said, why he said it. I say nothing and continue to look down as I felt a hand under my chin, moving my head upwards.

A-I love you y/n, more than a friendship.

He says inches away from my lips. His hot breath hitting me as he stares at my lips. He slowly leaned in, closing the gap between us he kissed me.

Y-I love you too

——/

Guys this was the worst thing I've ever written ✌🏼😂🥺

Word count- 763