Safe Blood | English translation

2. collapse

I opened my eyes . still tired and my eyes ache.

I heard sound of water in the bathroom.

Stood up with closed eyes and went to the bathroom door. Looked for the (door)handle
and opened it.

Sounds became louder and my body got wet
Suddenly, my hand was stretched out
I screamed and drops of water fell on my hair.

I stared at his bare chest with my open mouth and my hair in front of my face.

His sweet little laugh echoed in the bathroom.

I was still in shock.

Leaned against his wet chest.

Murphy : you wet me!!!

My voice came out of my mouth just a little indistinct because of the water.

Zayn : You came in yourself !!!

Murphy : Hmmmmm...

He took his hand down to remove my soaked sleepwear.

I raised my hands. He took it from my neck and threw it on the floor . His hands were on top of my body. I saw from the bottom , it's starting to tighten.

Oh , it's not going to be okay.

Last time I tried so hard to stop him.

His finger went down on my spine
he knows how to tame me.

To get rid of his fingers , I took a step closer to get away.

He held up my chin and touched my lips.

I pressed my lips tightly together.

I'm not going to let his tongue begging for a touch to break my fence.

He understood, when he put his tongue on his lips , he understood. He got away from me , but only slightly.

Z : Don't do that again, Morph!

I nodded. his lips came back to my lips. I pressed my eyes tightly.

He grabbed me by the hands and went deeper. I'm a little insecure.

He pulled his hands up and down on my body and pulled my nipple.

He damn knows how to make me scream.

I sighed , and he put his tongue in my mouth. He kept rubbing my chest. my body relaxed , and all my weight fell on the hand that was still on my flank.

He had no intention of releasing my tongue and pulled his finger around my nipple my body bent back. His lips came back to my neck with tempting kisses.

I grabbed the back of his shoulders he
started sucking my shoulder and kept going . it could be blood now.

I got up and put my hands on his wet chest and pushed him back, but there was no point.

Without thinking , my hand went down the front of our stomachs...I held it in my hand and pressed it with the most force and it worked.

He ripped his lips apart and stared at me with hazy eyes.

Pain got him down, but he's starting to get angry.

M : I - I didn't mean that....

I denied and tried.

Z : what the fuck murph???

I shook my head left and right to show that I didn't get it.

Z : You really know what a relationship is like?

He got out of the bathroom and i followed him and covered myself in a towel.

M : I wasn't myself and I'm sorry about that.

Z : No, morph I didn't mean just this. You always reject me. I kiss you but I feel like im forcing you. it's been two months since our relationship but we only had sex once.
and It's not about having sex, because I understand what your childhood did to you and its hard for you to trust, but that kiss! I don't understand. I don't … I don't..

He paused a moment and a drop of tears poured down my cheek.

Z : I can't take this situation anymore.

I burst into tears and sat on my knees...saw him go to his wardrobe to wear his clothes.

He went to the door I know. That if he leaved the room when he came back I shouldn't be here.

M : i'm sorry i'm..

I sobed aloud.

M : I love you i don't want to hurt you.i pushed myself away beacause...I'm just ...

My body began to shake and he hug me.

M : I just don't want to lose you ! Please don't leave me.

Put my head on his chest.

Z : Just tell me what your problem is. am I not enough for you ? am I hurting you ?

I stared at his magical eyes.

M : No , of course not , you're all I want in my whole life.

He smiled. I love his stubble.

Z : so What's the matter? Tell me I'm trying to be the best for you.

The one that makes this relationship end is not my secret.

His fingers touched my cheeks.

He turned my head to his face , and his lips kissed mine.

Z : Just tell me , help us , okay?

I shouldn't be selfish. He deserves to know the situation and decide.

M : it's about the same thing.

He put my head on his shoulder.

Z : When you were a kid?

he whispered.

M : Yeah , I was only twelve years old when he rap...ra...

Z : Don't hurt yourself by saying it. Go on .

I breathed. thank you for being so good.

What do you want me to say ? How do I say that ?

I hid my face in his neck.

Z : You 're afraid of having an affair because of him ! You want to go to a psychologist or something?

M : That won't help.

Z : You have to try it . We can't go on like this Morph.

I hid my face in his neck. I prepared myself for the warmth of his arms for the last time in my heart.